“Are you kidding me, Alex?” she asks shrilly, and I try not to wince as I open her door.
Turning back to face her, I can’t resist saying, “Yeah, sorry, babe, but I’m sure that phone will keep you occupied. Maybe turn it on vibrate?”
There’s a loud thump against the door after I close it and I can’t help but smirk.
* * *
Pulling into the garage, I breathe a sigh of relief. Tonight with Sophia was going to be a mistake.
She called me four times on my way home, but I have to congratulate myself on not picking up the call. I’m pretty smart sometimes.
“Where’s my baby girl?” I yell into the house.
Chapter Eleven
Christy
Alex yells out for Muffin and she immediately jumps off my bed and sprints out of my room.
I’ve been sitting in my room all evening with her, stewing in my own thoughts, and she’s been a total sweetie. I think she can tell something is wrong with me.
Seriously, I don’t understand what the fuck is going on. I have no claims on Alex. After all, I’m just his charity case. But when he told me he was going out on a date tonight it pissed me off.
Ever since he left, I’ve had the strongest urge to punch something.
Like his big head.
Or stupid face.
Walking up to my door, I slam it hard. Yes, I know it’s passive-aggressive, but it conveys my message perfectly.
I hope his date sucked. I hope he catches crabs or something.
He’s back early…
I wonder what that says about him in the sack. He’s a little too speedy?
Ha!
And yes, I’m being petty now but I’m feeling a bit better already.
Sitting on my bed, I pull out my phone and check my messages for the hundredth time today. Nicole still hasn’t texted me. Usually, she’s back from her dad’s already because she’ll have school, but the number zero blinks up at me.
She’d never abandon me, willingly. Something must have happened.
Plugging my phone back in, I set it on the nightstand and throw myself back on the bed. The TV is on, the sound soft in the background, but I haven’t been able to focus on anything. I stare up at the ceiling instead.
A couple of minutes later I can hear Alex’s big butt stomping up the stairs. His steps pause outside my door and I hold my breath.
I hope he doesn’t try to talk to me because I just want to go off on him… for no reason.
Thankfully, a couple of seconds later I hear him stomping away. I release the breath, relieved that there will be no ugly confrontation.
But why am I so mad? Why? Am I jealous?
Fuck… I think that’s it.
I’m jealous.
But maybe I’m jealous for the right reasons… and not for the wrong reasons.
Like… if he starts going out with a chick and she objects to me, then what? Will I have to move out? Will he have to choose between her and me?
Yeah, that’s totally it.
I’m worried about my current living situation, not about him hooking up with someone else…
At least, that’s what I’m going to keep telling myself.
I don’t care who he hooks up with. I don’t care if he goes out every night with a different woman.
But then I start picturing him in my head with another chick and it makes me feel sick and angry.
Ugh. There’s no doubt about it now—I’m seriously crushing on him.
And this is beyond bad.
Rolling over onto my stomach, I try to relax. I try to get this knot behind my ribs to loosen up but it only seems to tighten the more I think about it.
Alex is what, ten years older than me? Twelve?
And he looks at me like I’m a kid.
We’ve barely gotten to know each other over the past couple of days. I shouldn’t be feeling so possessive of him. Especially because it’s obvious he doesn’t feel the same about me. If he did, he wouldn’t have gone out tonight.
I can’t let myself fall for him. I can’t. I’m only going to get hurt if I don’t get my shit together.
I’m a grown woman now, I tell myself. I need to be able to handle adult shit like this.
But how do I fix this?
I’ve seen him around the gym plenty of times over the past few months and was never interested in him. What’s changed? How do I go back to that? The indifference…
Maybe I should just talk to him and find out how his date went.
Yeah, maybe if I hear him talk about the other woman I’ll be able to come to terms with this and put my feelings to rest.
Pushing off the bed, I slide off the edge and straighten with determination.
I don’t like all the feelings swirling around inside my stomach, or the awful scenarios playing out inside my head. Confronting this head-on is probably the best way to be rid of them.