Blackbird (Redemption 1)

“We’re supposed to be forever,” he gritted out. “Until we’re old and gray.”

“Please try to understand. Please try to forgive me. We had plans, but life changed them. I hate imagining the grief you lived with. I promise I would’ve put an end to it if I could’ve.” Tears slipped down my cheeks when I whispered, “All I want is for you to be happy.”

“You are what makes me happy.”

I slowly released his face and searched his heartbroken eyes. “Please . . . let me go. I’m not that girl anymore.”

“Briar.” My name was nothing more than a forced breath.

Nearly a minute passed as he strained to digest what I was saying, before his arms fell limply to his sides, and he slowly backed away, his head shaking subtly as he did.

“I . . . I don’t—” Another pained breath left him, and with one last agonizing look, he turned and staggered away.

I watched until he rounded the ambulance before I turned to find my devil . . . my heart . . . my home.

Lucas—Trent—watched me carefully as I walked toward him, and when I was nearly halfway he stalked toward me, quickly eating up the rest of the distance.

“You idiot,” I seethed as he got closer.

“I know, Blackbird,” he whispered just before he pulled me into his arms and pressed his mouth to mine.

His lips moved against mine roughly, his hands gripping me tightly, but his tongue slid against mine in a slow, torturous dance that could’ve made me forget about the night and everything that it had been filled with, if it weren’t for the intense ache in my chest.

“You idiot,” I repeated when his mouth moved to my jaw and then down my throat.

“I had to,” he whispered when his lips met my collarbone. After one last lingering kiss there, he dropped his forehead in the same spot and pulled me impossibly closer.

“Had to?” I mumbled and wove my hands through his hair to bring his face in front of mine. “I chose you long ago. Why couldn’t you see that?”

That devastating smile tugged at his lips, and his head shook once. “I know you did.” The smile fell, and he let out a heavy breath. “But I didn’t think I’d make it out alive, and I knew you planned to be with me every step of the way. He was the only way you’d leave—the only way to get you to safety once it all went wrong.” He brushed his thumb over my lips, and a ghost of a smile played on his. “And even though your safe way out was waiting for you, your stubbornness almost got you killed anyway.”

“It’s where I belong,” I said simply.

There was a long pause before he said gruffly, “You didn’t stop him when he kissed you.”

“I didn’t have the strength to. I didn’t have the strength to move until I realized you were gone.” I searched his dark eyes, seeing the pain there, and asked, “Is that why you left?”

“I couldn’t watch my worst fear play out in front of me.”

“He knows where I stand now,” I said softly. “He knows I can’t be without you.”

An ache for the man I had loved flared in my chest, but it was nothing compared to the thought of losing the one holding me.

“Trent?” I asked hesitantly. “Trent Cruz.”

My devil regarded me silently for a few moments before dipping his head once in confirmation.

“That might take some time to get used to.”

“Briar,” he began warily, “have you ever thought what being with me means?” When I didn’t respond, he continued, “I told you I was going into witness protection before I was pulled into this life. I was just told that the last of the trials ended a few months ago, every last member of my crew is in prison—and they’re going to be there for a long time. That doesn’t mean they won’t have people who look for me. So even though this bust will be all over the news, I’ve been assured I won’t be.

He searched my eyes and dipped his head close as he whispered, “I won’t be leaving here as Trent Cruz, because I’d have to spend the rest of my life looking over my shoulder. I can’t live like that, and I won’t do that to you. But the second I stepped out of that building, I was no longer Lucas Holt. The house, the cars, the money . . . it’s all gone except for what I made working at the company. The FBI have assured me of that, but I’ll still be starting over again.”

“When have I ever wanted the money you had?” I asked just as softly. “I don’t need Lucas Holt, and I don’t need a name from who you were a lifetime ago. As long as my devil is by my side, I have everything I’ll ever need.”

His lips brushed against mine softly, tenderly. The hand on my face dropped to my waist, and then the back of his knuckles trailed across my stomach in question.

My breath caught, and I looked up to find his knowing stare locked on me.