“You are my mate, but I have not claimed you.”
Oh! Because she was weak. The knowledge hurt when it should not have. “Because you believe me to be fragile,” she said hoarsely.
He cocked his head and a cruel smile edged his lips. “That is but one aspect. You are the progeny of the kingdom of wind and mountains. I cannot simply keep you.”
He did not seem ruffled at the thought she would go back to her nation. “Are you saying it does not matter if I leave?”
“Yes”
“So I am not your mate?” she snapped, almost confused with herself.
She was not even sure why she was asking. After all, the fear that he would refuse her departure had been dispelled, so nothing else should concern her.
“You are mine and only mine. There will never be another for me. Because of our beasts we can mate only once. You fascinate me. Your laughter, your smiles, your generosity, your impulsiveness, your body, your scent and your taste; you sway me like nothing else could.”
Saieke’s breath hitched at the pain of loss that scythed through his chakra. The burning need to soothe him almost crippled her. She understood why he would relinquish her. If there was even a chance loving her could mean the loss of his self like his brother, he would deny her.
“Would you have claimed me if I was a Darkan?” She could not understand the need to know, but it pressed in on her.
“If you were a Darkan who accepted her demon…yes.”
She hated the pain twisting through her veins. “I see.”
“I can feel your pain and I do not understand it.”
She flicked her hand and the water rose in a wave that pushed her swiftly toward him. It molded her to him and the heat from him was sharp and sublime. “I only for a moment imagined what it would be like…if I was yours and you were mine.”
Haunting shadows shifted in his eyes. She twined her hands around his neck and kissed him. Their tongues stroked and soothed, and she did not hesitate when she felt the insidious scrape across her mind. She opened completely to his probe and absorbed the full essence of man and beast. The fascination, gentleness and uncertainty balanced the other brutal emotions that swamped her mind. She shifted through them and absorbed them into her essence. She gently pulled her lips from his. “The way you fascinate me makes me apprehensive. I seem to ache for you constantly.”
The sensual smile that slashed his mouth had her heart leaping in excitement.
“You smile…” she whispered as she traced the curve of his lips. “I am not sure I will ever get used to such an intrusion against my mind. Is it that you are able to read my inner most thoughts?”
“You are my only mate, I am untutored as well.”
Saieke laughed huskily. “Did you make a jest, Drac?”
“No, I only speak in absolutes. You will be my only mate.”
Her heart lurched.
“Why do you fear at the mere mention of mate? I will not hold you to a claiming.”
How could he be so accepting of such a position? From what he said there would be no other for him. He was willing to live without love or companionship until his death? Even though she had sworn never to be weak to the idea of love, she always knew she would marry and find happiness with her king. Never would she consign herself to a lifetime of loneness, without even knowing the joy of having a family for herself. “You speak with such convictions of never claiming me.” After a hesitant breath she continued, “I must return to Boreas to fulfill the honor bargain and to nullify the blood-oath to Nuria. I am not sure I will ever be able to return to the Darkage.”
Hooded eyes seemed to devour her face as he took in every nuance of her expressions.
“I can feel the fear that is in your heart. It is repulsive to me.”
“It is not intentional. I do not fear that you will bring harm. I fear the loss of myself. I ache to be with you, yet I hardly know you. I crave you even knowing my kingdom would never accept you as my royal consort.”
Saieke tried not to recoil from the insidious brush against her mind. “I want to know you…but I cannot.”
“Open your mind to me and I will show you.”
“What do you mean?”
“Lei allow us to connect as one. I can share my memories. They will come to you as how I experienced them.”