He slowed to a walk, and I followed him, barely making out the winding path in the moonlight. His shoulders, his arms, every part of him seemed strung tight.
For a while, all I heard was the chuff of his breath and the scuffing of our footsteps along the gravel. When Ronan finally broke the silence, he sounded no less angry. “You haven’t answered me. ”
“What do you mean?” I asked, knowing full well what he’d meant.
“Does this have to do with the vampire McCloud?”
“No,” I replied quickly. Too quickly.
He stopped short and spun to look at me. I almost ran into his chest, and I took a step back. His eyes were focused hard on me, and even in the darkness I could see his anger shimmering there. “Don’t trust anyone. Least of all a vampire. ”
“Does that mean I shouldn’t trust you?”
“Annelise. ” His tone had flipped from angry to tired, and the sound of it made something inside me feel very, very sad. “Sometimes you can be so foolish. ” I opened my mouth to speak, but he put up a hand, stopping me. “I know you do these things because you are loyal. Your heart is true, and I admire it. But please. Don’t let it get you killed. ”
I was truehearted? Suddenly my throat ached with emotion. I wanted to assure him that I wouldn’t get myself killed, but I couldn’t bear the lie. Instead, I told him, “You could help me, you know. ”
I sensed his hesitation as he began to walk again. “What are you up to?”
I answered his question with a question. “Why would the vampires want to kill one of their own?”
“Don’t see my honesty as an opportunity to take advantage. ”
“I’m not taking advantage—everyone knows Carden is going to get staked. ”
“Carden?”
I panicked at my slip and quickly asked, “When will it happen? Tonight?”
He shot me an annoyed look. “No. They’re planning a public trial. ”
I tried to keep my sigh of relief quiet from Ronan. “Any excuse for a little pomp and circumstance. ”
He gave me a lingering, sidelong look. “I caution you. ”
Had he heard my relief? Was that what he cautioned me against, or was it just my snarky comment that’d bugged him?
“And there’ll be a public execution, I assume?”
“One would assume. ” Sensing my question before I had a chance to voice it, he added, “Don’t ask me why, Annelise. The Directorate has motivations that are beyond my understanding. ”
“The Directorate,” I repeated. Only recently had I heard the term. It made me think of some sort of star chamber and a bunch of cloaked vampires sitting at a round table, passing judgment. Not unlike what I’d seen on the other island, actually.
Ronan probably heard my question forming, because he upped his pace as the backside of the Acari dorm came into view.
I didn’t have much time left, so I spoke quickly to get out one or two of the million questions that were pinging around my brain. “Does that mean not every vampire is in the Directorate? Are they the ones in charge of the island? What are they up to?” By the time he edged around the side of the building, I was jogging to keep up.
We arrived at the front stairs, and Ronan turned, his expression unreadable. He didn’t answer me, though. He only told me in a tired voice, “Go to sleep, Ann. ”
I’d been going on guts and stupidity, and as the heavy dorm door shut behind me, the reality of what I’d done and how I was back safely hit me. As the adrenaline left my body, a weird jiggly feeling creeped up my legs, weakening them beneath me. I held on to the banister as though I were scaling Everest instead of the stairway back to my dorm.
I found that I was eager to see Mei-Ling, to talk to someone and actually have a normal conversation. I wondered if Emma snagged me a dinner roll like I’d asked her to. I was starving.
Between the hunger, the adrenaline, and all my many, many questions, my hands were trembling by the time I managed to unlock my door and get back into my room. My vision had tunneled into two tiny black points.
Mei would be there, waiting for me—I could almost feel her presence in the room. She’d be a friendly face. A voice of reason. I’d confide in her, and we’d figure out how to proceed. Maybe she’d play her flute, and it’d relax my mind, opening it to calm plans and bright ideas.
I shut the door, leaning my head against the doorjamb, feeling so very, very relieved. “You would not believe the day I had. ”