Eastern Lights (Compass 2)

“I think I can agree on all of those rules.”

“Well, good. Then do we have a deal?” I held my hand out toward her.

“Deal,” she said, shaking my hand. “But, I will pay rent, you will accept it, and I am officially offering you an IOU for anything and everything you might need from me in the coming days, weeks, or months.”

“Sounds good. I’ll keep that IOU tucked in close to me for when I need it. Welcome home, roomie,” I stated before she dropped my hand.

I looked out to the city lights, took in a deep breath, and released it slowly through my mouth. I didn’t know why, but the idea of Aaliyah staying with me brought a level of peace over me, as if she was always supposed to be there. I was certain she thought I was helping her out, but I felt as if I was the one who’d won. Being around her felt like being around the better part of me.

26

Aaliyah

I was moving in with Connor Roe, my favorite superhero. I couldn’t even wrap my head around the fact, but I felt a strange sense of comfort about the idea. Whenever I was around him, I felt safe, which didn’t make much sense. In the grand scheme of things, we hadn’t known one another that long, but at the same time, I felt as if we’d been connected for years.

Even so, I couldn’t really focus on the move until I handled a certain issue that kept popping up in my life. Ever since the wedding that never happened, I’d received an influx of messages from Jason’s mother. Voicemails, text messages, emails—she’d tried to reach out to me on every platform multiple times.

Marie: Hey, Aaliyah. Are you coming to the book club meeting this week? The ladies are asking about you.

Marie: We should grab a coffee. I miss you, sweetheart.

Marie: Have you heard from my son?

Marie: I know you need space, so no need to respond to any of my messages. Just know that I’m here, and I’m sending them so you know you are loved, and Walter and I miss you. Maybe we can grab a drink, you and me? I’m worried about you.

Marie: You have your scheduled doctor’s appointment this week, right? I had it marked on my calendar. I hope everything is going well. Please let me know, Aaliyah. I’m worried.

I was trying my best to set a boundary with Marie, letting her know I needed time and space to regroup, but I felt awful about the idea of her sitting and worrying about me and my health conditions. Therefore, every now and again, I’d shoot her a text message to let her know I was okay.

Greta from work told me I owed Marie nothing, not even a second of my time or energy. She said Marie was being passive-aggressive with all the messages she sent me, and perhaps that was true. But the guilt of ignoring her messages was getting to me, especially with all she and Walter had done for me in the past. Even though Jason hadn’t treated me right, that didn’t mean his parents hadn’t. Jason and I ending our relationship was one thing, but ending the relationship I had with his parents—Marie more so—was turning out to be harder. I felt my bond with her more than Jason’s and my connection. I considered her a friend.

But after the breakup, I knew Marie would become a casualty of our relationship falling apart. Over time, she’d create reasons in her mind that I was at fault for Jason and me not working out somehow. She wouldn’t even know she was doing it, either. She’d just get information from her son, the child she raised, and he’d manipulate her thoughts into believing he’d been wronged by me.

In the end, she’d always side with her family member. That’s how life works.

I’d officially reached the point when I knew I had to cut the cord between Marie and me. Even if I’d miss her friendship, I knew I had to put a stop to it before it took a toxic turn.

“Thank you for meeting with me, Aaliyah,” Marie said as we sat down in the coffee shop we used to frequent regularly. The comfort and ease I always had with her wasn’t there that morning, though. If anything, I felt entirely out of place sitting across from her, as if I no longer belonged there.

“Of course. I figured after all the messages you’ve sent, we should just get it over with.”

“Get it all over with? What do you mean?” she asked, hurt in her voice.

“Aren’t you looking for closure? I’m not sure what else could happen for us after everything that took place with your son.”

“No, not at all. I refuse to believe you and I cannot stay in one another’s lives. You don’t know what it means to me that you’ve come into my world, that we’d crossed paths all those years ago right here in this café. I love you, Aaliyah, and I don’t want what my son did to change our relationship. Plus…” She hesitated as if she wasn’t certain she wanted to speak her next words. “He still loves you, honey.”