She was right. He was a typical man, and as a proud, card-carrying member of the species, he wasn’t comfortable discussing his feelings or emotions. But he owed it to the woman who raised him the best she could on her own to explain. He had a hunch he’d have to do the same with Charlotte—if he wanted a second chance.
And he did.
“You and I started talking about this the other day.” Roman leaned forward in his seat. “I was eleven when Dad died. And watching you in so much pain, well, I realized this trip home, it made me want to withdraw from anything that close to me. Being a journalist, by nature of the job, let me remain detached. I couldn’t be detached here at home. Not with you and not with Charlotte.”
Raina expelled some of the obvious anger, fears, and frustration with one long breath. “I’m sorry. For everything.”
“You can’t hold yourself responsible for fate. Or someone else’s reaction to it.”
She met his gaze. “You really don’t understand.”
“I do. And I love you for your concern, but don’t stress over it.” He rose. “If you do, I’ll report straight back to your doctor.” Eric or his associate would give his mother a good talking-to if she risked her health in any way.
Roman narrowed his gaze and took a good look at his mother. Dark rings circled her eyes, little makeup coated her cheeks. She’d put less time into her appearance. Because she tired more easily? he wondered. Worry about him and Charlotte couldn’t help the situation and he tried to set her mind at ease. “You’ve done your job incredibly well. Chase, Rick, and I can take care of ourselves. I promise.” He brushed a kiss over her cheek.
She stood and walked along with him back to the garage. “I love you, son.”
“Same here, Mom. You’ve got a good heart and—”
“Roman, speaking of my heart …”
He shook his head. “No more talk,” he said in a drill-sergeant, no-nonsense tone. “I want you upstairs and resting. Draw the shades and take a nap. Watch Netflix. Something, anything as long as you’re off your feet and not overthinking about your sons.”
“Is it me or did you put a fast end to this conversation about your stupid coin toss?”
He laughed. “Never could put one over on you, but no, I’m not trying to distract you, just keep you healthy. I answered your question about why we got into the coin toss. Now I’ll tell you another truth that’ll help you sleep well. I’m grateful for it. I no longer look at marriage as punishment. Not to the right woman, anyway.” A woman who wanted nothing to do with him, but, Roman decided, it was time he forced the issue.
His mother’s face lit up, her eyes sparkling and green. “I knew something had changed since you got home. But what about your recent … how do I say this delicately? Your bad mood?”
“I’ll solve my problems, you take a nap.”
She scowled at him. “Just make sure you fix things with Charlotte.”
“I never said—”
She patted his cheek as she so often did when he was a child. “You didn’t have to say. Mothers know these things.”
He rolled his eyes and pointed toward the house. “Into bed.”
She saluted and walked inside. He stared after her, thinking of all the advice she’d given him through the years and of the happy marriage she’d shared with his father. He didn’t blame her for wanting the same for her sons. With hindsight, like his mother, he couldn’t believe he, Rick, and Chase had stooped to tossing a coin to decide their fate.
Roman debated, wondering if he should try to explain to Charlotte one more time, but decided against it. She wasn’t willing to discuss things again and she had good reason. All he could do in conversation was reiterate the past. And the fact that he had no plan in mind for the future.
The next time he faced Charlotte, he had to possess proof of his feelings and intentions. Only then could he lay his heart in her hands and dare her to walk away.
He grabbed the portable phone he’d left in the garage and dialed his brothers. Ten minutes later, they gathered back in the garage where this whole nightmare had begun. Roman started by explaining the situation up to and including the extent of their mother’s knowledge about their agreement.
“Now that you’re up to speed, you two need to look out for Mom. Make sure she gets rest and doesn’t stay up trying to figure out ways to fix my life. I can do that myself.”
“How?” Chase folded his arms across his chest.
“By going to D.C.” He needed to prove to Charlotte he could handle settling down. He’d come back with a steady job and a plan of action. One that would make them both happy.