“Parker,” I said again, this time sitting on the bench at the foot of the bed so we’d be eye to eye. “I’m sorry. All right?”
Her gaze stayed unfocused as she nodded. “It’s fine. Things were said …”
“No.” I took her hand and found it cold. Unacceptable. Holding it between both of mine, I softened my voice as best I could. “I was a fuc—a jerk. I shouldn’t have said those things, making you feel cheap. It wasn’t true and I didn’t mean them. It was a dic—It was wrong to do.”
Parker’s lips wobbled with a smile. “Am I imagining things or are you attempting to refrain from cursing?”
“Yeah, well …” I rubbed the back of my tense neck but kept hold of her hand with my other one. “It seemed like a good way to show my sincerity and respect for the situation.”
Her smile finally bloomed, and I swear it was like the sun coming out of clouds. Hell. I was a fuck—freaking mess.
“Just when I finally start cursing, you’ve gone and stopped.”
It felt good to grin. “Well, that’s different.” I tugged her a little closer. “You letting go and cursing is sexy as he—heck.”
Her laughter sparkled over my skin and lifted a weight off my heart. “As heck, huh?”
“Heck, yeah.”
Laughing softly, her gaze clashed with mine. Heat bloomed under my skin, and I drew in an unsteady breath. God, I wanted to hold onto her slim but curvy hips, cup her fine ass and give it a squeeze.
No. I couldn’t do that. We had undeniable chemistry, but we’d never work in the real world. Not when she couldn’t even introduce me to her family without looking like she was about to throw up.
My smile died, as reality sank like a stone in my gut. We didn’t have a future, but we were partners, and I’d done her wrong in more ways than one. “I shouldn’t have grabbed you like I did. I regret that most of all.”
A frown wrinkled between her brows. “Let me see if I have this straight. You regret … getting physical with me?”
This felt like a trap. My instincts were screaming that it was most definitely a trap. “Yes?”
Her eyes narrowed. “Is that an answer or a question?”
Yep, definitely a trap. Resting my forearms on my thighs, I tried to think of a way to explain myself without digging a deeper hole. “I’m a big guy with a hell of a lot of strength. I didn’t ask for permission, didn’t handle you with care. I just … took.”
She hummed under her breath. I had no idea what that meant, so I forged on, acutely aware that I was probably stepping in it. “I shouldn’t have manhandled you.”
Parker turned away and went back to her post by the window. Afternoon light slanted in and colored her skin bronze. I couldn’t tell if she was pissed, grateful, disappointed, or something else. She’d shut down completely.
I’d have admired her game face if it wasn’t currently being used against me. I stood and rubbed my neck. “It was especially wrong considering we’re just …” I couldn’t say it, though. My mouth refused to do it.
Parker glanced back at me, her brows a fierce line. “Just what?”
The memory of her ashen face when she told her parents that I was her boyfriend flashed in my mind, and the words punched out of me. “Business. We’re just business partners, Parker.”
She made a sound, not quite a snort but close, then tilted her head back to blink up at the ceiling. For a horrible second, I thought she might cry. But then she laughed with a bitterness that surprised me. “You want to hear something funny?”
She sounded so dull and remote, I wasn’t sure if she was asking. I didn’t get to answer before she looked at me again, those deep brown eyes spearing my chest. “You kissing me, me kissing you, the way you touched me on the couch, that was my favorite part of the whole horrible day.”
The floor tipped my feet as heat rushed up my back. “Parker …”
“I’m attracted to you,” she went on, like I hadn’t said a word, her tone growing stronger. “Despite everything, I find myself wanting you. I dread sleeping on that bed with you because I find it exceedingly hard to keep my hands to myself.”
Holy shit. My knees went weak, my dick hard as a pike.
“Which really just … sucks,” she said, growing a little wild and shrill. “Because you keep throwing the truth in my face. That we’re nothing but a deal, a monetary means to an end for both of us. And I feel …” She looked around wildly as though searching for the word, and then it exploded out of her. “Stupid. Fucking stupid!”
God, she was brave. Magnificent. My brave, beautiful girl.