Her breath catches.
Again.
And again.
Her groan flows into my ears.
It's music. The best I've ever heard.
Then her groans run together, and she's the only thing in my universe. The sharp breaths, the low grunts, the expression of utter bliss.
Her groans run together as she comes.
There's a soft thud.
Her grabbing for something. Or slamming her back into the wall.
I can see her. Here. On my couch, legs spread, eyes on me. One hand between her legs. The other digging into the leather.
Or bent over my desk. Her head turned. Her hands bound behind her back. Her fingers curling into her palms as she comes.
She slows for a minute. Then her breath speeds. Her groans grow louder.
She comes quickly.
In thirty seconds. A minute maybe.
Her orgasm steals every second of my attention.
For a moment, the world makes perfect sense.
I know exactly what I'm doing.
I know exactly what she wants.
And exactly how to give it to her.
"Fuck." She catches her breath. "Was that… Are you…"
"Fucking beautiful."
"Yeah?" There's a blush in her voice.
"Yes."
"Are you… Will you go now?"
"No."
"If I beg?" she asks.
"No," I say.
"Are you hard?"
"Very."
"So you're just… going to stay that way?" she asks.
"Yes."
"Can I help you with that? Later?"
"Later?"
"Thursday. I have an appointment later. For the IUD."
Fuck.
"Some people say it hurts for a few days. But—"
"Do you want me to come with you?"
"With me?"
"To your appointment?"
"No. I've got it. Thanks though."
"Of course."
She lets out a shallow breath. "I, uh, I forgot what I was saying."
My chest warms. I wore her out. It is an accomplishment. "You want to fuck me Thursday."
"I want to fuck you right now. But, uh, Thursday seems smart. You can come over. Or I can. Sienna is studying at the library all week."
"Let me know after your appointment," I say. "How you're feeling."
"You're going to ask me to wait if it hurts."
"Do you want to have to wait an extra few days?"
"No."
"Then let me know. Please."
"Okay." Her voice returns to normal. "It's a real skill, making being caring sound like a cruel order."
"Thank you."
"You're welcome."
"Come over after work. In the harness."
"Oh."
"Any of them. Nothing else under your clothes. Or I'll have to punish you."
Her breath catches.
"I won't tease. Or warn you. Understand?"
"I do."
I'm giving her the chance to disobey me.
It's up to her to take it.
Chapter Thirty-Three
Ty
All afternoon, I think of Indigo.
I consider texting Sienna to ask for an update. Offering her depraved details in exchange for intel on Indie's condition.
But I know better.
No matter how badly I want to know everything about her, I have to trust her to tell me.
I'm halfway through a run when she texts.
Indigo: Done. Painful. But done.
Ty: I can come over. Fix dinner.
Take care of her.
Indigo: No. If you come over, I'm going to fuck you. And I'm supposed to wait twenty-four hours.
Ty: You doubt my self-control?
Indigo: No. But I don't want to experience it.
Ty: Are you alone?
Indigo: I would say I like where this is going, but I have a feeling I won't.
Ty: Is your sister around to fix dinner?
Indigo: Studying with a friend.
Ty: I'll send something.
Indigo: You're going to send me dinner?
Ty: It's that. Or I come over. Your choice.
Indigo: You come over and you don't fuck me.
Ty: Yes.
Indigo: Can I suck you off?
Ty: No.
Indigo: No?
Ty: Is there something unclear about no?
Indigo: I've never known men to turn down blow jobs.
Ty: You won't distract me by making me jealous.
She will. Easily. But maybe she doesn't realize that.
Indigo: That isn't what I meant.
Ty: No? You didn't want me to think about some other man coming in your mouth?
Indigo: I've never let someone else come in my mouth.
My balls tighten.
She is trying to win this game. Just not the way I guessed.
Indigo: If I want it, and you enjoy it, why not?
Ty: Because I want to come inside you the next time I touch you.
Indigo: Tease.
Ty: I warned you.
Indigo: I won't convince you, will I?
Ty: You can try.
She's quiet for a few minutes, then she replies.
Indigo: Fine. Send dinner. Just dinner.
I ring Paloma with instructions. The Italian restaurant. Her favorite dish. The wine we shared.
Ty: It will be forty-five minutes.
Indigo: Is Thursday really a day and a half away?
Ty: It is.
Indigo: Are you sure? Can we just cancel Wednesday?
Ty: No.
Indigo: Will you fuck yourself?
Ty: Right now?
Indigo: Right now.
Ty: What did I just say?
Indigo: You're not touching me.
She's right on a technicality.
Ty: I want to come inside you the next time I come.
Indigo: Oh.
Ty: You're going to have to wait.
She texts a thanks for the food.
And an update on her condition Wednesday morning. She feels fine. Like she could come over tonight.
But she knows better than to ask.
I think of her all day. As I arrange everything for our date. As I toss and turn all night.
I give up on sleep just before sunrise.
The deep blue of the sky fades to a softer shade.
The sun rises. Streaks the sky red. Orange. Yellow.