She offers an apologetic shrug. "The case was off. But I'll try…" She looks me in the eyes. "Do you want him here?"
"It's okay," I say.
"Do you want me here?" she asks. "Or do you want to make room for that booty call?"
My eyes flit to Ty's. There's hope in his gorgeous brown eyes. Apology.
Or maybe I'm imagining things.
"Hmm… I don't know," Sienna says. "I'm not hearing a promise sex will be involved. Or a threat it won't be involved if I stay."
"It's okay," I say. "You can go."
"Did I offer to go?" She makes a show of scratching her head. "I don't remember offering to go."
"Scram," I say. "Or no details later."
"So details later?" She fist pumps. "Okay, bye, Ty. Remember what I said."
"Always," he says.
She shoots me one last are you okay look. When I nod, she steps into her shoes, grabs her bag, leaves.
The door shuts behind her.
And we're alone.
The two of us. In my space. In my life.
It's not the first time, but it feels different. Charged.
"I brought you something." He takes a step toward me. Pulls the ring box from his jeans. Sets it on the table.
"Is that what I think it is?" I ask.
"Yes. I want you to have it, whatever you decide."
"Whatever I decide?"
He nods.
I wrap my hands around my chest. It's hot in here, but I still need the warmth. The comfort. "Sienna was right. You look good in jeans."
"You've seen them before."
"I can still appreciate them now." I swallow hard. "And I believe the proper response is thank you."
"What about, how about I take them off and fuck you?"
My body whines. Yes. Hell yes. Every yes.
It doesn't matter that he broke my heart, that he'll never love me, that it's entirely possible he spent the night fucking Rory.
It only cares about the feeling of his skin against mine.
"If I said yes?" I ask.
"If it was that or nothing." He nods. "But I'm not here to fuck you."
I swallow hard.
"I'm here to talk." He takes another step toward me. "To tell you something." His eyes meet mine. "I love you."
Fuck. It steals my breath.
"There are so many ways to explain it, but only one makes sense to me. You make me happy."
"I make you happy?"
"If that's not love, what is?"
He's right.
Sometimes it feels complicated, but it's simple. I trust him; I need him; I crave him.
And he makes me happy.
That's love.
"I'm sorry I took so long to see it. I was scared. Scared of opening myself up to loss." He takes my hand. Runs his thumb along the space between my thumb and index finger. "I'm not brave the way you are."
"You have to be scared to be brave. Otherwise, you're just reckless."
"But I'm not. I didn't face my fear. I let it consume me." His voice stays soft. "I told myself that was the only way to stay safe. If I didn't love anyone, no one could leave me. I convinced myself I was incapable. Maybe I was. But that changed. I just didn't realize it."
"When did it change?"
"I don't know. I'm still not sure what it means to love someone. I'm not good at it anymore. Maybe I've never been very good at it."
I shake my head. "You are."
"That's why you've been crying?"
I nod.
"Indie… I'm sorry. I'm sorry I didn't see it. I'm sorry I hurt you. I'd do anything to not hurt you again." He cups my cheek with his palm. "But I will. I'm not good at this. I need you to be patient with me."
I nod into his hand.
"I… I still want to marry you."
"I know."
"But we can wait. If that's what you want, we can wait forever." He runs his thumb over my temple. "I love you. And I want to be what you need. Everything you need."
"I love you too." I kiss him before he can reply.
The kiss he returns is soft and slow.
Love in physical form.
Then it's harder.
Rougher.
Everything else I want. The Ty only I get.
I don't have to ask.
He lifts me into his arms. Carries me to the bed.
Fucks me until I'm groaning his name.
Chapter Fifty-Four
Indigo
It's past sunset. It's almost time.
Where's the venue assistant?
Where's Sienna?
I stand. Suck a breath through my teeth. Sink into my heels.
Three inches. So I'm eye to eye with Ty.
Three inches too many today. I need steady. I need my feet on the ground.
The door swings open. Sienna darts through. Runs, really. She's in sensible silver flats and a short purple dress.
A tomboy forced to dress up, compromising with a comfortable fit and flare number. Beautiful in a Sienna way.
She could be my maid of honor. That's what a normal person would do, make her sister her maid of honor.
Instead, I asked her to walk me down the aisle. It felt right. It still does.
"Your shoes?" Sienna asks.
"Huh?"
"You're teetering."
Of course I'm teetering. I'm getting married tonight.