‘Claire.’
She turned towards him, her eyes widening as he bent his head and she felt the warm brush of his mouth against her own. It was an odd sensation, that soft touch of warm lips. It made her quiver inside, and realise on a searing wave of pain that never once in her life had she been kissed properly.
The sudden shocking hiss of boiling milk spilling on to the cooker jolted her back to reality, her body stiffening with rejection and fear. Immediately Jay released her.
‘I’m sorry.’ He sounded weary. ‘For a moment I forgot ….’
What had he forgotten? That he wasn’t coming home to Susie? ‘It doesn’t matter …’
She just caught the expression of grimness tightening his mouth before he turned away.
‘I was just making myself a cup of chocolate. Would you like one … or something to eat?’ she asked hurriedly.
‘These smell good.’
He had obviously recognised her conciliatory offer and was trying to respond to it, Claire realised as he picked up one of her mince pies and ate it.
‘Chocolate will be fine, and then an early night, I think. I ate on the plane.’
‘Shall we drink it in the sitting-room?’
Those few moments of strained intimacy might never have occurred. On the surface all was as it had always been, but beneath the surface Claire was just beginning to realise that there lurked some very treacherous waters indeed.
What would have happened if the milk hadn’t boiled over? Would he have gone on kissing her? Would she have let him …? It was too uncomfortable an avenue of thought for her to pursue.
‘You go through; I’ll bring the chocolate in a minute.’
The faintly sardonic look he gave her made her face burn. Did he realise how odd his proximity was making her feel? She felt that she needed to be alone to get herself back to normal. That brief pressure of his mouth against hers had unleashed a series of sensations she was till having difficulty coming to terms with.
It hadn’t been dislike or fear she had felt in those few seconds before reality had intruded, far from it. So, what had she felt? Shock, grief for all that was missing from her life, and also a frisson of pleasure so delicate and new to her that even now she wasn’t sure if she had experienced it or merely imagined it. But surely it was impossible to imagine something like that—something she had never known before in her life, or dreamed of knowing? Now she had known it.
Shaking herself free of her confusing thoughts, she put the two mugs of chocolate on a tray and added a plate of mince pies, quickly making some sandwiches from the ham she had roasted that morning.
Jay was sitting on the settee when she walked in, his head relaxed against the cushions. ‘I like the tree,’ he commented, getting up to pull up one of the small coffee-tables for her to put the tray on.
The room had an open fireplace with an immense cream marble surround, part of the original Victorian architecture. Susie had had the fireplace blocked off, and one of the first things Claire had done was to have it re-opened and an attractive coal effect gas fire installed. She switched it on, and paused for a moment to watch the flickering flames.
‘Mmm … very cosy.’ An expression of sadness seemed to cloud Jay’s eyes.
‘The girls wanted to wait until you came home to decorate it, but I thought you might be too late.’
‘There’s nothing on the top.’
‘I couldn’t reach,’ Claire confessed. ‘There’s a fairy in the box that the girls chose.’
‘I’ll put it on for them tomorrow. Mmm, these are good.’
He was eating one of the sandwiches she had made. Without his suit jacket and his shirt open at the throat he looked less formidable. He was tired, she realised.
‘How did it go in Dallas?’ she asked.
‘Come and sit down here beside me and I’ll tell you.’
She sat next to him on the sofa.
‘What an excellent wife you are, Claire: caring, obedient …’
At first she thought he was mocking her and she flushed painfully and started to move away, his hand on her arm stopping her.