As though he sensed her awareness of him, he said calmly, ‘Go back to sleep, Claire, there’s nothing to be afraid of …’
Nine-tenths asleep, she mumbled back, ‘I’m not afraid, I’m cold.’
He laughed again, and the sound held a faint hint of indulgent affection. ‘If you were the little girl you sound like I could cuddle you until you get warm, but …’
He caught her sharply indrawn breath.
‘Claire, what is it? You surely don’t think I …’
‘The last person to cuddle me was my father, and then he died, and …’ She was wide awake now, shivering with a mixture of cold and pain.
She heard the noise Jay made deep in his throat—somewhere between a growl and a groan—and she felt him move, but didn’t know why, until she felt her body being turned and held close to his own, one arm holding her gently, while his free hand stroked the nape of her neck comfortingly.
‘Part of you is still a frightened little girl, isn’t it? Poor little Claire!’
She wasn’t a little girl, and it was ridiculous for him to assume that she wanted him to treat her as such. She wanted to be strong and cool, and to push him away, to freeze him off, and make him regret that he had dared to trespass into her most private feelings, and yet the way he was holding her, comforting her, brought back memories so long suppressed. This was what she had craved and longed for after her parents’ death—someone to hold and comfort her—but there had been no one, no one at all, and then afterwards … after … him … the thought of anyone touching her had been so abhorrent that she had forgotten that she had ever felt like this.
Instinctively, without being aware of it, she snuggled closer to him, unaware of his sharp intake of breath, or the tension invading his body. He felt warm and safe, and he smelled … nice … she thought woollily, burying her face against his skin and breathing in the scent of it with the voluptuous innocence of a small child. He was only wearing pyjama bottoms, and she liked the sensation of his flesh beneath her hand, where it rested against his chest. She wriggled closer.
‘Claire …’ She froze as Jay moved away from her, his hands clamping roun
d her wrists. ‘I’m sorry—I shouldn’t have touched you.’ His voice was hard and remote.
What he meant was that he didn’t want her to touch him. Claire’s face burned as she realised what she had done. Instantly she retreated to the other side of the bed, feeling as bruised and rejected as only a woman in love can feel when the man she loves physically repulses her.
‘Claire … Look, let’s talk about this.’
She heard the tentative, gentle note of enquiry in his voice but ignored it. She wasn’t in the mood to have a reasoned discussion on what had happened.
The very fact that Jay thought it was something they could talk reasonably about was enough. If he had been here in bed with Susie … The instant the treacherous thought formed she tried to suppress it, but it was too late. Jealousy seared her, leaving her raw and vulnerable, prey to emotions she had never known existed. Despite her exhaustion it was hours before she finally fell asleep.
WHEN SHE WOKE UP, THE SUN was shining and she was alone. She glanced at her watch and blinked. Half past ten. She really had overslept.
She got up and padded through into the girls’ room. It was empty. They must all be downstairs. Putting clean clothes and underwear on the bed she went through into the bathroom, shedding both her nightdress and her robe. She was just about to step into the shower when she saw it. The most enormous spider she had ever seen! And it had seen her—she was convinced of it, convinced that it was staring at her with malevolent glee.
She opened her mouth and screamed in pure panic-reaction, totally unable to drag her attention away from the soft, pulsating body and horrid mass of hairy legs.
Her scream had been pure instinct, and the last thing she had expected was for the bathroom door to be flung open.
‘Claire? Ah … I see … It’s all right, come on.’
She was hardly conscious of Jay’s hand on her arm as he gently tugged her out of the bathroom and back into the bedroom. It was only when he closed the door, firmly locking the spider inside that she actually dared to breathe again. Jay released her, but she clung to him, shaking.
‘It’s all right. I just want to get your robe for you.’
For the first time she became conscious that she was naked, and her whole body turned a delicate shade of pink as Jay stepped away from her and then turned to look at her.
There was something strangely driven, reluctant almost in the way he studied her naked body. No doubt compared to Susie she was very ordinary indeed, but there was nothing wrong with the smooth suppleness of her skin, she thought proudly and her waist was narrow enough for Jay to span with both his hands if he wanted to do so. Her breasts weren’t particularly large, but they were firm.
She forgot why they were here like this as Jay stared at her; a curious and very intense ache throbbed through her body. Her nipples swelled and hardened into deeply rosy nubs of flesh.
Jay was watching her with a darkly intense absorption. Her stomach muscles fluttered a nervous protest, and she touched startled fingertips to her skin.
‘Claire, for God’s sake!’
Jay’s harsh protest exploded into the silence engulfing them. She looked at him with innocent, hesitant eyes, caught up in a mass of conflicting sensations and emotions.
Her face was flushed, his eyes glittering between narrowed lashes. He swallowed, and she followed the movement of his throat, seeing the tiny beads of perspiration dampening his skin. His shirt was open at the throat, revealing a dark tangle of soft hair.