Summer Sins

‘I think you don’t feel comfortable being vulnerable.’

‘So you think I’m nice as well, do you?’

‘I think you like people to think you’re a tough guy but underneath you have feelings, you just don’t like to have them on show,’ she said.

He dabbed at his lip again. ‘

What feelings have you uncovered, baby girl?’ he asked with a mocking edge to his tone.

‘You love Daniel; I know you do.’

‘I have never said I don’t.’

‘His stepfather appears to believe differently,’ she said, recalling again Mrs Beckforth’s comments.

‘And you believe that jerk’s account, do you?’

Hayley didn’t know what to believe. She was becoming increasingly confused. Daniel and Jasper’s relationship was hard to figure out. ‘I can only go on what I’m told,’ she said. ‘And you tell me nothing, so what else can I believe?’

His mouth tightened, making his lip ooze more blood. He swiped at it angrily as he glared down at her. ‘I told you to stay out of my affairs,’ he said. ‘This has nothing to do with you. It’s between Miriam and Daniel and I.’

‘That’s not true,’ she argued. ‘I might only be a temporary wife but I care about you. I care about Daniel too.’

‘You’ve only just met him. How can you possibly feel anything for him?’

‘I do care about him,’ she insisted. ‘And I care about you. I love you. There, I’ve said it. I love you. I think I always have.’

His expression grew as tight as a closed fist. ‘You’re talking rubbish as usual. You’re looking for security but I’m not the one to give it to you. You know the rules, Hayley. As soon as possible we’ll be divorcing.’

‘I don’t want a divorce.’

His whole body froze as if she had just sprayed him with quick-setting concrete. ‘But I do,’ he said in a chillingly hard tone.

Tears sprang to her eyes. ‘I know you don’t mean that,’ she choked. ‘You’re pushing me away because I’ve come too close. I know you, Jasper. I know you.’

‘You’re confusing sexual compatibility with something else.’

‘So you admit we’re compatible?’ she asked.

‘I can hardly deny it. As I said the other day you’re a great lay, sweetheart, but as to a future together—forget it.’

She blinked back the bitter tears. ‘I can’t believe you’re throwing away this chance at a life together. We could be so happy together, Jasper. I know we could.’

‘For how long?’

‘For ever.’

He gave a grunt of cynicism. ‘You’ve been watching too many romantic movies. It doesn’t work in the real world. Besides, you want different things out of life. You want kids and I don’t.’

‘But why not?’ she asked, trying to ignore the tight clench of despair gripping her stomach. ‘From what I’ve seen so far Daniel is a son to be proud of. He speaks so highly of you. He called you his best friend. How could you not want to experience that again, perhaps with a daughter or another son?’

‘Because I’ve seen what it can do to a kid when parents separate or divorce,’ he said bitterly. ‘For years I’ve lain awake at night worrying if I did the right thing by Daniel. I don’t want to have that on my conscience ever again.’

Hayley felt his pain like an electric current in the air.

She had judged him so wrongly, accusing him of not caring about his son when the truth was he cared too much to damage Daniel’s life as he had been damaged by his parents’ bitter divorce. No wonder he had resisted marrying Miriam, especially at such a young age, in spite of the pressure put on him to do so. She was well aware of the statistics as he would have been too; teenage marriages rarely lasted the distance and the children of such early unions were nearly always the casualties.

‘But you did do the right thing by Daniel,’ she said softly. ‘I didn’t realise it before, but you’ve been there for him all this time.’