I can tempt her, but I can’t win.
Well, maybe I can, but not on my terms.
I don’t want to win a permanent spot in her heart by coming clean. She didn’t win her permanent spot in mine by keeping her word.
I wanted her desire for me to overcome all the other bullshit. I wanted her surrender.
But as Anderson tugs Riley close and she numbly leans into him, I realize I don’t have time for that.
If she sleeps with him because of what I’ve done, I’ll never forgive me, either.
Chapter Thirty Two
Riley
Sara ditches me to ride to homecoming in a stretch limo with Valerie and her friends Saturday night.
I feel a lot of ways about it. Hurt, most of all. Abandoned. Betrayed.
But also curious.
Will Hunter be in that limo? He’s obviously Valerie’s date to homecoming. He might’ve embarrassed her in the gym by turning his cheek, but that was before he realized Anderson and I were back together.
After that, he kissed her right in front of me.
Thinking about it still makes my stomach hurt.
I don’t even want to go to the stupid dance, but it’s too late to back out. I bought the dress and shoes, and Anderson shows up with a corsage. He looks nice in a burgundy dress shirt and black slacks, but I still think I’m gonna break up with him again tonight.
I know eventually I will have to move on and get over Hunter, but it won’t be with him. There’s no point stringing him along since I already know that.
I also still haven’t gotten my period, and just in case I am pregnant, I would prefer for it not to look like that’s the reason we broke up. I want to be good and single by the time I start to show.
What a thing to think about as I’m getting ready to leave for homecoming.
“One more picture,” Mom insists, following us out on the front porch.
I glance back at her. “You’ve taken enough.”
“Maybe by the car,” she says, grasping at straws.
I glance at Anderson’s silver Lexus. It’s a nice car, sure, but it’s not exactly a horse-drawn carriage. Looking back at Mom, I shake my head. “I have to draw a line somewhere. This is it. You’re cut off. You’ve taken enough pictures.”
She pouts. “But you look so pretty!”
“I promise to look pretty again sometime in the future, you can take more pictures of me then.”
Mom shoots me a dirty look. “Bite your tongue, you always look pretty.”
“We’re going to be late,” I tell her.
“I should’ve volunteered to chaperone,” she says. “I could’ve taken sneaky pictures all night long. Maybe I should sneak in…”
“Mom.”
Ray reaches out, grabbing her by the hips and tugging her back against him. Securing his arms around her waist, he says, “Don’t worry, kiddo, I’ll make sure she behaves herself. You guys have fun.” He looks at Anderson, dead-eyed. “Just not too much fun.”
I sigh dramatically, grabbing Anderson’s hand and hauling him toward the car. “God, you guys are so embarrassing.”
“We love you,” Mom calls back. “Be safe. Have fun! Text me if you need anything.”
Despite my manufactured annoyance, I can’t keep a delighted smile off my face as I drop into the passenger seat of Anderson’s car.
My mom is nothing new, she has always been there being her crazy self, but having a father figure to go along with her? That’s a whole new experience. I don’t hate having a protective man around to mean-mug my boyfriends and keep Mom company while I’m gone.
“Are you excited?” Anderson asks, noticing my smile as he starts the car.
“For the dance? No.”
“Oh.”
“No offense,” I say quickly. “It’s just, I was already a little worried about getting a bucket of pig’s blood dumped on my head tonight, and now I’m on homecoming court. That’s starting to seem a lot less far-fetched.” I glance over at him. “If they call my name for queen and the gym doors start slamming shut, don’t be surprised.”
Anderson frowns. “Huh?”
I wait a second for it to click, but when he continues to stare at me like I’ve said something strange—well, stranger than what I actually said—I frown at him. “Carrie? You like Stephen King, how did you miss that reference?”
“Oh. Right.” He shakes his head, checking the rearview before he starts to back out of the driveway. “Well, if you have secret telekinetic powers I don’t know about, make sure you use them to crush Hunter, not me.”
I shake my head. “It wasn’t Hunter. He was as shocked as I was when they called my name. I think it was Valerie. On the face of it, she hates me, so why would she want me to get the glory of homecoming court? But that’s emotional and short-sighted. She’s smart enough to play the long game. I just don’t know what the long game is. It really might be pig’s blood. Maybe she’s a secret horror movie buff.”