Always the One (Always and Forever 1)

Making our way out of the bar, I watch Trey hail us a cab.

I busy myself and send Lana a quick text letting her know we left. Sliding into the back seat of the cab, the door shuts and the confined silence surrounds us. We both stay quiet. My mind, however, is talking too loud. She’s trying to process where this night is going and how in the heck we got here.

The first few minutes have passed and we haven’t said anything more than a couple of comments about the Seattle rain. I’m getting the feeling I’m not the only nervous one in the cab. Finally, he takes the plunge first.

“You really look beautiful, baby.”

Baby? First babe now baby.

“Baby? Trey…” I take a deep breath and look over at him. “What’s going on, you’re acting totally…different, I mean you never act like this with me. This is the second time you have called me some pet name, do you want to explain that to me?” He lets out a loud puff of air, and I see the storms gathering in his head. He isn’t sure either. I knew it; this is way too good to be true.

“Honestly, I don’t know, Shay, I’m just as confused. Let’s talk upstairs,” he says as the cab pulls to a stop in front of our building. I make a quick escape. I feel like I’m suffocating and just need to get some fresh air. Leaving my comfort zone is something that rarely, if ever, happens.

“Hey, wait up!” Trey says after me, as I take measured strides toward the revolving doors at the entrance of our building, waving quickly at our doorman, and leaving Trey in the dust, while he chases after me. I rush to the elevator and repeatedly push the up button, willing it to open faster with my mind. I’m not sure why my feet took flight, like I’m angry or something, I just felt the urge to run was stronger than staying. Right before the doors close he puts his hand in-between the metal doors, causing them to slide open again. He tilts his head slowly and squints at me, saying nothing as he steps in beside me.

What the actual hell is happening?

One minute we’re flirting and being open with each other, the next we are acting like complete strangers sharing an elevator. We remain silent as we make our way to my apartment door, and I contemplate shutting the door in his face and leaving him on the other side. Talking through the door seems safer and more realistic at the rate we’re going.

My shaking hands slide the key into the lock, turning it with haste. Trey has been nothing but a gentleman tonight, and if I’m being totally honest with myself, he is acting exactly how I wish he would. So why am I so shaken up?

Setting my clutch down and removing my jacket, he follows suit. We both head for the couch and the air feels thicker. I feel my insides burning. Spit it out, I just want him to spit it out already.

“Shay, listen… I know this is…” He pauses and sits on the coffee table, making it so he’s directly in front of me; he then places his hands on my knees.

“Shit, I don’t even know where to begin.” He and I both, I’m just as freaking shocked as the next person.

“Just say it, Trey, it’s me, you can always be comfortable to tell me whatever’s going on.” He’s known me for almost his entire life, and he knows that whatever he says is kept safe with me because we’re best friends.

“I know it’s you. That’s what makes this so hard, you know it’s hard for me to just spit my feelings out on the table.” He looks out the window and continues. “Ever since my mom walked out on me and my dad, I never trusted women, never wanted a girlfriend.” He takes a deep breath and I set my hands on his, giving them a light squeeze, encouraging him to continue. I know he’s not good with his emotions, but I know he can also be pretty sensitive. “I couldn’t trust a woman to not take my heart and fucking crush it, that was until.” He pauses, leaving me even more anxious and on the edge of my seat. He’s killing me, I’m curious to know what the heck is happening.

“Until what, Trey? That was until what?” I say, anxiously. He looks back over at me, his eyes are flashing with raw emotions.

Taking a deep breath, he starts again.

“Until you came along and we grew up. Growing up with you, things just progressed and I fell for you.” He stops and I feel my chest rising and falling, I can actually hear my heart pounding in my ears.

“You fell for me, like you like me?” He smiles that megawatt smile and I feel like I’m dreaming, this can’t be happening to me. Tonight I thought I would just flirt and he wouldn’t even notice it. Now, here he sits in front of me, giving me the words I craved to hear for years.

“Yes, I fell for you. I like you a lot, Shay, and I want to try this”—he waves his hands between us—“I want to try us.”

God, this is so surreal, but I’m not scared or hesitant anymore. Call me crazy, but I want to try this, too. My biggest worry is my brother. I don’t know if Trey has told Kings. I know my brother pretty well and if he knew about it he would have told me. But I truly don’t care. I’m not going to turn him down; this is what I’ve wanted this whole time. Some girls don’t get what they ask for this easily, so I’m considering myself lucky. Considering this to be a touch from the hands of fate.

“Trey, I want this, too.” He laughs, and all of a sudden I’m yelping as he helps me straddle his lap. I chuckle, feeling completely messed up in the head. One second my internal dialogue is screaming for me to run and now it’s telling me to grasp onto him and erase all space between us. Close isn’t close enough.

“That didn’t take too much convincing, now did it?” he teases with a cocky grin.

“No, no it didn’t. You can be pretty persuasive with your pretty smile and perfect hair.” He stands and spins me then heads toward my bedroom. Causing my nerves to come back.

A room, Trey, me, and a bed. Not a good combination.

“You forgot to mention my perfect eyes,” he says, winking at me then setting me down on the bed.

“What’re we doing?” He walks over to my dresser and starts going through the drawers with determination, and I see him grab my sleep shorts and tank top. I notice he found that drawer way too quickly. How did he know I kept my pajamas in there?

“You, baby, are going to get into your pajamas and meet me in the living room, and I’m going to be a gentleman and cuddle my girl while subjecting myself to a chick flick.”

Feeling a little more at ease, I take a deep breath, my mind wanders back to moments ago in the living room, where he pulled me in his arms, surrounding me with him. I was close enough to kiss his lips, and I was begging for it in my mind but then he brought me in here. I swear I think about those lips way too often, imagining them on mine. They’re plump, pink, and they look almost edible. I’ve wanted to kiss him for years now, and now’s my chance to do it.