It started raining, of course, but I only barely noticed.
“School’s pretty good this year,” I said to the slab of marble beside me. “The team is doing well. Oh, yeah—Real Messini is actually checking me out, too. That made Dad happy.”
I reached over and yanked one of the mums off the plant. My fingers slowly shredded the petals from the flower. The rain poured down a little harder, plastering my hair to my forehead. I needed a haircut.
“I’m taking a couple of AP classes. Shakespeare is one of them, which I thought you would like. Biology, too. There’s a girl in there…a new girl. She’s from Minnesota. It’s Sheriff Skye’s daughter. She, um…she’s really…interesting. I think I kind of like her, you know? Not like the other girls…but I never told you about them. I don’t think you’d really approve, you know? Well, no you don’t, but anyway…”
I took a deep breath and wiped some of the rain from my face.
“I think I really like her,” I continued. “She’s just different. She’s smart—I can tell that, even though we only have one class together. The thing is—I kind of pissed her off. She heard me saying some stuff…it wasn’t very nice stuff…and now she won’t talk to me. I don’t know what to do.”
I reached out and ran my finger over and over the letter “F” carved into the marble.
“I wish you were here so you could tell me what I should do. I’ve never really had to…well, to do anything to get a girl to like me. I don’t know how to do that. I’m not really sure what there is to like. She said I was a jerk…but she danced with me at the city banquet. She’s so pretty, and she smells good.”
I closed my eyes and leaned my head against my knees. My clothes were soaked through, and there was a breeze that was sending a chill through me. I leaned over and placed the side of my face against her headstone. I could feel the indentation of her name against my cheek. When I opened my eyes again, my vision was all blurred from pressing against the stone.
“I miss you,” I whispered. “Dad misses you, too. I know he doesn’t come here and tell you that, but he really does. I helped him tie his bowtie again this year. He’s afraid of being alone when I’m gone. I told him to come with me, but I don’t think he really wants to. I just remind him of you, and it hurts him too much to have me around and to know it’s all my fault. He’s stuck. He doesn’t want me around, but he doesn’t want me gone, either.”
I closed my eyes again, trying not to think…not to remember.
It didn’t work.
I listened to the rain.
I listened to my heartbeat.
I listened to the bass, choking sounds as I tried to breathe deeply.
At some point, the rain stopped.
I blocked out the sounds altogether, and listened to the sounds inside my head—the sounds of the machine that was keeping her body alive even though she was already gone. I listened to my Dad’s screaming and the steady thump of his fists on my body.
“Thomas?”
I didn’t move.
“Thomas?” This time, the sound was accompanied by a soft touch against my hand. I opened my eyes to long, muscular legs encased in red running shoes. I licked my lips and thought about how I might respond, but I didn’t know what to say.
“Come on, Thomas.”
The first hand was joined by another, and they started to work together to pull me up by my arm. I obliged, pushing myself first to my knees and then to my feet. As my eyes managed to focus a little more, I saw Nicole at my side, wrapping her arm around my waist and leading me away.
“Rumple?”
“Yes?”
&nb
sp; I sighed and leaned my head on top of hers. She kept her arm around me as we walked toward my car.
“Give me your keys,” she said.
“Why?”
“I really don’t think you should be driving.”
I tried to process the information.