This kiss though. I kept going back to that simple kiss all day.
It had meant more to me than anything we’d done before. More than the playful sex. More than being tied up and giving him my trust. More than finding a stray dog on the side of the road.
It had meant things were… possible.
That I was wanted for more.
That had left me in a haze of thought, but thankfully, I was always that way it seemed because neither Clint or Johnny commented all day.
It made me think I could get past my messed up life. I wanted to ignore Dax. Everything about him. I knew how to get myself out of the mess, but I had to be in Colorado to do it. I had to get the shipment of ketamine from my office and take it to the police along with the texts from Dax. I had to share them with Mr. Claymore. Face the consequences.
But I couldn’t avoid Dax. Or his calls. Fuck. I wanted to take my phone and flush it down the toilet. Hell, shove it into the manure pile on the far side of the stable. I just wanted it over. But Dax didn’t know that, and I had to suck it up. Had to hold on for a little while longer.
“H-hello?”
“I’m sitting here having some dinner with a new friend,” he said. His voice was surprisingly… light.
“Hi, sweetpea.” I sucked in a sharp breath at hearing Pops on the other end, my heart flying to my throat. “A friend of yours stopped by to eat. Unlike you, he likes gravy on his dinner. Even on his green beans and pot roast.”
My hands turned ice cold. I wanted to puke and faint at the same time.
Dax was with Pops. In our house.
I stood, paced. He knew where we lived. Had probably just knocked on the door, and Pops had let him in. Everyone liked Dax. Hell, everyone fell for his acting. Even my grandfather.
“Are you okay?” I asked, trying to sound calm.
He didn’t sound upset or hurt. “Fine, sweetpea. We’re going to watch some shows. Says he’s going to stay with me while you’re gone. Isn’t that nice?”
Pops wouldn’t have let a stranger stay in the house if he had all his faculties. This was a weak moment for him, and Dax was taking advantage.
“Can I talk to Dax again?” I asked, not wanting Pops to hand the phone off, wanting to keep talking to him, so I knew he was all right.
“Yeah?” Dax asked.
“You hurt him in any way, I’ll—”
“You’ll what? All I want is the package, sweetpea. Now.”
“I’m in Montana,” I countered.
“You have until tomorrow morning.”
I stalled in my pacing. Tomorrow morning? “I can’t get there by then!”
“Yes, you can. Move it, sweetheart. We’ll be waiting.”
He hung up.
I stared at my cell. None of that conversation had been recorded. It wasn’t a text, so there was no proof of what he said. Of how he’d threatened me. The fact that Dax was in my house.
I had to go. I had to do as he said. My intentions to tell the police would have to wait. I had to give Dax what he wanted because he was with Pops. Adrenaline pumped through my veins. I couldn’t stand still. Couldn’t think straight. I had to go.
I had to go now. I had to get to my grandfather.
Shit. Seraphina.
Holy shit. Levi. Thankfully, he’d texted earlier and said he had to work a traffic accident and would be late, deciding to spend the night at Clint’s parents’ house in town. I wasn’t thankful about the traffic accident, God. At least he wouldn’t be here to stop me because I wasn’t sure if I could leave if he did.
My heart literally broke in two with the idea of leaving him. Leaving without explanation, without saying goodbye. He wanted me to stay, and yet here I was, fleeing after dark without saying goodbye.
There was no alternative. It was better this way. He wanted me, the me he knew, not the me I’d been hiding. He couldn’t know what I’d become. It was better to just leave, to have him think I bailed.
I couldn’t lie to him. Not any more than I already had. If I had to look him in the eye now, I doubted I’d be able to come up with something that would justify an abrupt and hasty late-night departure.
Once he knew the truth, it would be over anyway. I had been prepared to face the consequences with the cops. With Mr. Claymore. But with Levi?
That cut sliced the deepest.
But I had to get to Pops. He was what mattered.
Fuck. Levi mattered. Too much. That was the problem here. If Levi was just a fling as we’d planned, I wouldn’t have cared. He wouldn’t have either to find me gone. But he was more. So much more.