Wild (Wolf Ranch 2)

“There is no money for tuition. I’ve spent it on a rental property in the Caribbean. We’re staying there for a few months.”

I stared at Audrey’s bedroom wall processing his words. No tuition.

Of course, he let me down again. Every. Fucking. Time.

“But Dad, you said you’d pay for my education if I studied engineering. That’s what I’m doing.”

“I know, but the money is gone, cupcake.”

What. The. Fuck?

“It wouldn’t have been gone if you’d given it to the school.”

“Things change, kid. Cindy needed a break, and I used the money.”

Things change. He was right. They did. Including me. My dad had let me down. Big time. Why was I so surprised? Why did I always come last to him? Mom had gotten the shaft years ago, but I’d been strung along. Or maybe I’d just let him.

“Yeah, I’ve figured it all out,” I snapped. “You don’t give a shit, do you, Dad? You never have.” I spun in a circle.

“Okay, Marina. That’s enough.”

I glanced at Audrey who stood there, watching. Listening. She knew exactly what was happening.

“No, Dad. It’s not enough. It’s never been enough.”

With that, I hung up.

Audrey came over and wrapped me in her arms. “You okay?”

I nodded, staring blindly at the bed. “I’m done. My whole life I’ve been trying to be the good little girl in hopes I’d keep his attention. But now I finally see. I’m not the problem here. That man is incapable of being a decent father. He’s the definition of emotionally unavailable. He’s selfish and a total dick. I think I’m starting to see what you’ve been saying all long. You were the lucky one. He didn’t even try with you, so you didn’t develop these fucked up feelings of not being good enough.”

“Yes,” Audrey murmured.

“All this time, I’ve been wondering what I could do differently to be enough for him. I was bending and contorting myself to be what I thought he wanted. I stapled, folded and crunched myself to fit into the mold I thought he wanted for me. When in fact, he never wanted me in any mold because I don’t think he ever wanted kids at all!”

Aubrey blew out her breath. “I’m sorry.”

“No, it’s good. I finally realized it’s not my fault.” I tossed my phone on her bed. “None of it is. And I’m done trying to make someone love me who doesn’t. The toxic cycle ends here.”

“You’re absolutely right.” She took the towel off my head and stroked my damp hair. “You're worth more. You deserve all the love and respect in the world."

I looked her in the eye. “I don’t need that asshole.”

“You don’t. You have me. We’re family now.”

I had Audrey. And I had myself. Maybe for the first time. I squeezed her tight. “I love having a sister. You’re the best gift I could’ve ever received.” My eyes grew damp. “And I love that you’ve got Boyd, that you’re having a baby. I can’t wait to be an aunt!”

“You’ve been the gift in my life, too.”

“We don’t need him.”

“We never did.” She set her hand on my shoulder and met my gaze. “You’re strong all on your own.”

I nodded. “Yes. I think I’m just realizing that.”

Audrey smiled. “And you’ve got me. After tonight, I’ll be a Wolf, and you’ll have a family here. With all of us. That is, if you want.”

I moved and sat on the edge of her bed. “Well, it doesn’t look like I’m going back to school.”

She crossed her arms over her chest. “Oh yes, you are. You’re getting that degree.”

I threw my arms in the hair. “How? I don’t have the money for the tuition. Even if I picked up a full-time job on the side, I doubt it would cover all my expenses. God, I’m so naive, setting myself to be like this. I should’ve known and been prepared.”

“I have the money. I’ll give it to you. You’re not dropping out because our father is an asshole.”

I laughed at that, completely unused to her swearing.

“School’s important,” she continued. “I know you don’t love your field of study, but you could always switch majors.”

I held up my hand. “Oh no. I’m not switching now and adding an extra year on. Besides, I don’t know what I would switch to. It would be a waste of money to—”

“School is not a waste of money. It’s good to have a degree, even if you don’t go into that field for work. You can be whatever you want, Marina. You always could. Now you get to decide. You could transfer and go to school here in Montana. Or do an online program. I’m sure Colton would want you to be nearby.”

A little jab of pain ran through me at that. “Colton? He’s going back to North Carolina.”

She tilted her head. “Is he?”

“Well, he’s not sticking around for me.”