I can’t quite smile back, but I try. “It is now.”
“And then what?” Gio asks as he gets up.
I shrug, heaviness descending back on my shoulders. “I have no fucking idea.”
“No. Then you go get the girl. “That’s what this is about, right?”
My chest constricts painfully. Not a second has gone by since I drove away from Desiree that I haven’t thought about her. Wondered how she’s doing. What it’s like being reunited with her little boy. Whether she’s carrying my child right now.
I shake my head slowly.
“Junior. Don’t fuck this up. Or if you already did, then you’d better unfuck it. That girl made you happy. You’d better do whatever it takes to figure it out.”
I stare at Gio, not daring to listen to his advice. “But what if my happiness comes at the expense of hers?”
Gio winces a bit as he stands, his hand covering the wound. “Make sure it doesn’t.” He leaves me with that nugget and a wave.
Make sure it doesn’t. Can I?
What would it take to ensure Desiree’s happiness? Quitting the business—I’m doing that.
Divorcing Marne—that’s long overdue. I pick up the phone and dial my lawyer to draw up the papers. I’ll give her half of everything. She’ll be better off than she ever was married or separated from me.
* * *
Desiree
Junior Tacone is stalking me.
It’s been three weeks since he dropped me off at my apartment. Three weeks of getting to know my son again, loving him, playing with him, soaking up every second with him. And working my three twelve hour shifts that end at 7:00 p.m.
And every night when I walk out to my car, Junior’s black Maserati is parked somewhere in the vicinity. The first night I pretended I didn’t see him. I fully expected him to get out and corner me against my car, but he didn’t. Nothing happened. I got in my car and drove off, checking in the rear view mirror to see if he followed.
He didn’t.
The second night I marched over to his car. “What are you doing here?” I demanded when he rolled down the window.
“Just making sure you get to your car safely. I don’t like you walking out here alone at night.”
I put my hands on my hips. “Yeah, I did have trouble in this lot one time.” I watched his jaw tighten, expression turn foreboding. “Oh wait, they were your guys, weren’t they?”
He leaned back in his seat. “Well, your ex may show up anytime. I’m not here to interfere in your life. I’m just making sure you have back up if you need it.”
I stared at him, stunned. Well, if he wanted to play bodyguard, I’d let him. I figured he’d get tired of it soon. Or he’d renege on his promise not to interfere.
But neither of those things have happened yet.
And now I know for certain I’m carrying his baby. I had a blood test today at the hospital.
When Junior finds out, he’s going to put his claim on me, just like he’s kept his claim on his wife. I have no delusions that he’ll stay detached or removed.
And like his wife, I’m not sure I have the resources or the guts to fend him off.
I ignore him as I walk by, like I do every night he’s here. And like those nights, he makes no attempt to talk to me or attract my attention.
I get in my car and drive away, fighting the urge to turn around to drive back. Tell him about the baby.
His baby.
Our baby.
If he keeps stalking me like this, he’ll find out soon enough. And I doubt I’ll be strong enough to keep him away when that happens.
And that thought should be frightening, not reassuring.
Chapter 15
Desiree
Another wave of nausea hits me and I heave my breakfast into the toilet.
Thirteen weeks.
Hopefully by the end of next week I’ll be past the morning sickness phase.
“Mommy, you okay?” My sweet Jasper asks from the doorway.
“Yep,” I say brightly, splashing water on my face and rinsing my mouth out.
“You need someone here to take care of you.”
I turn, surprised by this observation. “You’re here, aren’t you?”
“I mean a man. Where’s your boyfriend?”
I go still. “What boyfriend?”
“The man who came with you when you got me from Daddy’s.” It’s the first time Jasper’s mentioned Junior. I’m sure I screwed up as a mother, but I never addressed what happened that night. I felt too emotional about breaking up with Junior and I guess I didn’t know what to say to Jasper to take away the trauma of what he saw.
“He would take care of you, Mommy. He would keep us safe.”
My heart starts to pound. “Safe from what?” My voice cracks.
“From Daddy. Or bad stuff. I think he wants to help us.”
“Jasper...how do you know? What makes you say that?”
Jasper shrugs. “I just know. He’d be a good dad to me.”