Branford continued to stand just behind me as he showed me around. I could hear every move he made but didn’t dare turn around to look at him. The conversation with Sunniva had certainly given me some insight into this man who was now my husband, but I was still unsure of what he intended to do with me. I felt his hand slide up from my lower back, around my arm, and up to my shoulder. He turned me slightly until I was facing a huge, grand bed.
“And this is our bed,” he said softly, leaning over to brush his lips over my ear. I felt a shiver run down my back at his touch and closed my eyes for a moment, trying to steady my breaths. Opening my eyes again, I looked over the beautiful golden silk covering with matching cascades of silk from the four posts at the corners. They were tied back to allow one to enter from either side, but sheer enough to see through them from any angle. I could feel Branford’s hot breath on my neck as he leaned over and kissed me just below my ear. He ran his hands down my arms, to my hips, up my sides, and down to my hips again. He rested them there lightly and kissed my neck once more.
“It’s…beautiful, my…Branford.”
“You’re beautiful,” Branford said. He chuckled softly and pulled my hair away from my neck with one hand. His mouth made a line across my skin. “I don’t recall seeing this dress before, but it suits you perfectly.”
His words swirled around in my head. I knew my fear had kept him from taking me the previous night, and I knew lying to the man he considered both king and father regarding the consummation our marriage had to have been very difficult for him as it would have been for anyone. Undoubtedly, he had reconsidered waiting until I came to him, which would likely take far too long for his tastes.
Sunniva said I needed to learn how to be…what was her word? Assertive? I wasn’t really sure what that meant, but I had a decent idea it meant saying what I wanted to say when I wanted to say it. I didn’t know if Branford was going to appreciate such a thing in his wife though, so I would have to be assertive quietly. If it was all right with him.
“Branford?”
“Yes, Alexandra?”
“Are you going to take me tonight?” I tried to keep my voice from trembling, but I couldn’t keep all of my anxiety hidden. The movements of his mouth against my throat stopped and he leaned back.
“According to my mother, you have had a trying day,” Branford said with a sigh. He took a step back and dropped his hands from me. “I think she is probably right, and though I would like nothing better than to punish you for making me look weak in front of the carriage driver and practically renouncing me in front of Camden, I think taking your virginity while I’m still quite angry with you is not advisable.”
I felt my whole body stiffen, and my teeth nearly punctured my lip. I didn’t turn to look at him, terrified of what I might see in his eyes. He wanted to punish me, he had said. What would he do to me?
He has a bit of a temper…
“I’m sorry,” I managed to squeak out. “It wasn’t my intent—”
“Hush,” he said, his voice calm again. How did he go from one extreme to the other so quickly? I let out my held breath. “I know you didn’t mean it. I’m still angry, but I know you didn’t mean it the way it appeared. If I thought you had intended to humiliate me…well, we would be engaging in a very different conversation.”
“Yes, my lord,” I said automatically. Branford moved up close behind me, and his arm came around me again. I felt his fingers under my chin, tilting my head toward his. I looked at him, saw his raised brows, and quickly corrected myself. “Branford.”
“I should have talked to you about how I would present you,” he said. He rested his hands on my shoulders again. “I hadn’t considered that such a display was not universal. Apparently, it isn’t.”
“I’d not heard of it, my…Branford.” Would I ever get that right? Addressing him in one manner away from others and back to his title when we were with company was difficult. I wasn’t sure if I would ever become adept at keeping the two separate. “Sunniva explained it to me. I hadn’t meant to speak for myself—I know I’m bound to you.”
“Hush.” Branford leaned back over me, and I felt his lips curve into a smile as they touched my neck again. “You understand now.”
“Will King Camden accept me as your wife?” I asked timidly.
“He already has,” Branford said simply.
“He wasn’t happy about it though,” I said, hoping I wasn’t pressing too hard. Branford sighed against my skin and stood upright again. He turned me to face him and looked down, his hands on the tops of my arms.
“Sunniva seems quite taken with you,” Branford said and laughed softly. “I think as long as she has accepted you, Camden will as well. Don’t dwell on it.”
“I’ll try,” I responded, not at all convinced it was as easy as such.
“I have some things I must attend to,” Branford said suddenly. He dropped his hands and started to walk away from me.
“Of course,” I replied.
“Make yourself at home,” he called over his shoulder. He smiled and chuckled softly before turning and heading back out of the door.
After Branford left, I began to look around the room, getting a little more familiar with its contents and the order of things. Parts of the room were quite dusty, so I used one of the cloths near the basin to wipe down some of the surfaces. I recalled what Branford said in the carriage about not trusting servants and wondered how long it had been since someone had cleaned in the rooms. They weren’t overly dirty but needed some attention. Once I had cleaned everything I could, added a couple more logs to the fire, and placed the kettle on its hook nearby, I sat on the stool by the fire and waited for Branford to return.
I tried to clear my mind and not dwell on everything, as Branford had instructed. I recalled my earlier conversation with Sunniva when we sewed together. Though some of her words eased my fears, others brought out completely new anxieties. At some point, all the people of the kingdom would depend on me. I hadn’t the slightest idea how to rule people and wasn’t so sure I wanted to tell others what to do. I didn’t even know what to do with myself. I sat, contemplated, and stared at the fire as it slowly turned to coals.
It had been quite some time since Branford had left our rooms, and I was starting to wond
er if I should go ahead and dress for bed. It was completely dark outside now, and I closed the shutters against the cooling night breeze. I had rebuilt the fires in both of the fireplaces inside the main room though the one in the sitting room had gone to coals. The water in the kettle had gone cold, so I warmed it again, let it go cold again, and warmed it again. I was considering doing it for the fourth time but then wondered if I should just wait for Branford to return and then warm the water. It was getting late, and I didn’t want him to have to wait for too long if he did want tea or wished to bathe before bed, so I put the kettle on again.