I let her go.
I know what everyone else said. We could have tried a long-distance relationship, but I knew it wouldn’t work. Not when our lives were practically on two sides of the continent. I was going to a state college to receive my teaching degree. There was no way in hell I could afford to do that in New York, not with my parents struggling to foot the bill here in Idaho. It was going to cost me almost double to move, and I refused to do that to them.
I stayed behind and went to school, partying a little and enjoying my college experience. But more often than not, she was on my mind. I wondered how she was doing in school, how she adjusted to the grueling work schedule that went with one of the top dance schools in the world. I was so fucking proud of her, even though I wasn’t with her.
Still am.
My hands tighten on the counter as I think back to all the bullshit she’s endured lately. First, the accident on set, which put an immediate halt to her bright career while she rehabbed. Then the news of her live-in boyfriend cheating on her with a much younger version of herself while she was licking her wounds.
Leonard.
What kind of name is Leonard anyway?
And who the fuck cheats on an amazing woman like Haven Decker?
A scumbag, douche nozzle, that’s who.
I push off the counter and head to the living room. I hit the remote power button just to fill the room with white noise before grabbing my bag. Dropping on the couch, I glance up to see the commentators discussing this weekend’s college football games, predicting who will win in the Big Ten Conference.
I pop a red felt pen out of the bag and glance down at the first paper. I work through the problems, marking which ones are incorrect, but it takes me longer than usual. Grading papers is something I generally enjoy, but tonight, I just find it mundane and difficult. My attention keeps going right back to the one person I should probably stop thinking about.
Yet, here I am, once again, letting my mind be consumed by Haven Decker.
I toss the papers aside, chastising myself for only getting three finished. I jump up, my legs needing to move, and head outside. The night air holds a touch of humidity and warmth as I lean against the railing and take a deep breath. I try to ignore my erection, but it’s hard.
Pun intended.
All I can think about is her. The excitement and shock that raced through me as I looked up into her green eyes for the first time in more than a decade. Inviting her to dinner, and her accepting. How her scent was just as familiar as the smile on her face. She knew how to light up a room, just by entering it. She could completely disarm me with just the slightest touch of her soft, delicate fingers on my skin.
My cock aches with need as those sweet memories flood my mind.
She was my first love, my first everything.
And now she’s home, even if for a short time. I have no clue what to do about that. All I know is spending just a few minutes in her presence feels like a homecoming. Like my soul has finally reconnected with its other half. And that’s just after spending an hour with her.
I glance down and groan in frustration. Both sexual and otherwise. There’s no way my cock will just magically subside until I take care of it. Haven is too fresh on the brain. I head inside, making sure the doors are all locked. A quick peek at Chloe confirms she’s still out cold, so I proceed to my bedroom. Grabbing the first pair of boxers in the drawer, I then slip into my en suite bathroom and lock the door.
I crank up the water as hot as I can stand and toss my dirty clothes in the hamper. The room fills with steam, the mirror covered, which is probably a good thing. I’m not sure I want to see my reflection right now. It’d probably display a combination of resolve, guilt, and desire, all rolled into one.
The water stings my back, but I ignore it. Leaning my forearms against the cool tile, I let the heat cascade over my taut body. My groin throbs, an unpleasant reminder of the longing I still possess for the first woman I ever loved. Her image has me taking my swollen cock in my hand and giving it a squeeze. Lust bolts through my veins as I close my eyes and succumb to the sensation.
My hand moves, slowly at first, as I think about Haven. Her plump, pouty lips I’d love to see wrapped around my cock, the feel of her hand replacing my own, and the pleasure in her eyes as she gazes up at me. My movements start to quicken as I recall all those times she cried out, my name on her lips, as she came all over my cock.