Princess Mia (The Princess Diaries 9)

“Yeah, but they were just old guys in wigs, not Lana Weinberger’s mom! I don’t know about this, Grandmère. I think maybe I should—”

“Of course, Lord only knows what we’ll do about your hair. I don’t suppose it will have grown in by then. Maybe Paolo can fashion some sort of extensions. I’ll phone him in the morning….”

“Seriously, Grandmère,” I said. “I think I—”

But it was too late. She’d already hung up, still muttering about hair extensions.

Great. This is all I need.

Saturday, September 11, 9 a.m., the loft

Inbox: 0

Which isn’t weird. I mean, he’s still got another three hours in the air. And then he has to go through customs.

So I just need to be patient. I just need to be calm. I just need to—

FTLOUIE: TINA!!!! ARE YOU THERE???? If you’re there, write back. I AM DYING!!!!

ILUVROMANCE: Hi, Mia! I’m here. Why are you dying?????

Oh, thank God. Thank God for Tina Hakim Baba.

FTLOUIE: Because while I know the bond Michael and I have is too strong to be torn asunder by a simple misunderstanding, and that he’s going to call when he gets to Japan and tell me he forgives me and everything is going to be all right—what if it isn’t? What if he doesn’t? Oh, God—my palms won’t stop sweating!!!!! And I think I might be having a heart attack….

ILUVROMANCE: Mia! It’s going to be all right! Of course Michael is going to forgive you! You guys will get back together, and everything is going to be just like it used to be. Better, even. Because couples who go through hard times together always come out stronger for it….

FTLOUIE: That’s right! And whatever, right? My ancestresses have faced far harsher adversity. Such as marauding invaders and abductions and being forced to drink wine out of their murdered fathers’ skulls and all of that. Michael and I will be fine!

ILUVROMANCE: Totally! So I take it you’re not going tonight, then?

FTLOUIE: Going to what?

ILUVROMANCE: To the victory party.

FTLOUIE: What victory party?

ILUVROMANCE: You know. Lilly and Perin’s victory party. For winning the student council election.

FTLOUIE: I wasn’t invited to any victory party.

ILUVROMANCE: You didn’t get the e-mail?

FTLOUIE: Noooooo….

ILUVROMANCE: Oh.

FTLOUIE: Oh, what?

ILUVROMANCE: I didn’t think she was serious.

FTLOUIE: Who? What are you talking about?

ILUVROMANCE: Lilly. She was saying she was never speaking to you again because you’re a backstabbing boyfriend-stealer. But I thought she was joking.

!!!!!!

FTLOUIE: WHAT???? HOW CAN SHE SAY THAT??? IT WAS ONLY A PECK!!! IT WAS SUPPOSED TO BE ON THE CHEEK!!! I ONLY GOT HIS LIPS BY MISTAKE!!!!