Princess Mia (The Princess Diaries 9)

Dad rolled his eyes. “Mia. It’s late. I’m going back to my suite. We’ll talk about this some more tomorrow. If,” I distinctly heard him mutter, “you haven’t gotten over it by then.”

Which really gets to the heart of the matter, doesn’t it? He thinks I’m just suffering from some adolescent female histrionics…the same kind that prompted him to put me into therapy, and Princess Amelie into signing that bill in the first place.

The bill he is ignoring because—basically—a girl wrote it.

Nice. Really nice.

And Grandmère was no help whatsoever. I mean, you would think a fellow woman would have some sympathy for my—and Amelie’s—plight.

But Grandmère is just like all those other women who go around wanting the same rights as men, but don’t want to call themselves feminists. Because that isn’t “feminine.”

After Dad left, she just looked at me and was like, “Well, Amelia, I’m still not sure what all that was about, but I told you not to bother with that dusty old diary. Now, are you ready for your speech tomorrow? Your suit has been delivered here, so I suppose the best thing would be for you to come straight over after school and change here.”

“I can’t come straight over after school,” I said to her. “I have therapy tomorrow.”

She blinked at me a few times—I was never sure how much Dad had told her about Dr. Knutz. But now I know it’s nothing—and went, “Well. After that then.”

!!!!!

Seriously. My grandmother finds out I’m in therapy, and all she says is for me to come over AFTERWARD to change for the speech I am ONLY giving because SHE wants to be a Domina Rei.

I could kill both of them right now. Dad AND Grandmère.

I came home so mad, I couldn’t even speak. I just went into my room and shut the door.

Not that Mom or Mr. G even noticed. They finally got all the seasons so far of The Wire on Netflix and are glued to the TV.

The TV in their BEDROOM.

Because no one took THEIR TV away.

I thought about going in there and telling them—well, Mom, anyway—what was going on. Except that I knew the information would cause her head to explode. Her former boyfriend and his mother robbing a woman of her basic human rights (because that’s what Dad and Grandmère are doing to Amelie)? Mom would be so on the warpath. She would get all her Riot Grrls on the phone and be down picketing the Genovian Embassy in no time. Then if that didn’t work, she’d karate chop Dad in the neck (she’s been working off her leftover pregnancy weight and is back up to her brown belt).

Except…

Except that’s not what I want.

For one thing, domestic violence is never the answer.

And for another, I don’t want my MOM to fix this. I need advice on how I can fix this. ME.

I can’t believe any of this. Can this actually—truly—be my life?

And if so…how did this happen?

Friday, September 24, English

Mia! Are you all right? You look like you didn’t get much sleep last night!

Yeah. That’d be because I didn’t.

Why???? Oh my gosh, did something happen with J.P.? Or MICHAEL???

Ha. No, Tina. Believe it or not, this has nothing to do with a boy. Well, except my dad.

Did he give you that speech again about how if you don’t study harder you won’t get into an Ivy League school and then you’ll end up married to a circus performer like your cousin Princess Stephanie? Because I’ve been meaning to say, I really think MOST people don’t end up getting into Ivy League schools, and very few of them end up married to contortionists, so I don’t think this is a very valid concern.

No. It’s worse than that.