Forever Princess (The Princess Diaries 10)

Or smell my boyfriend’s neck.

“That’s a great choice, Mia,” Mom said, looking super happy. Of course, she’s been looking super happy ever since she noticed the diamond ring on my left hand was gone, and I’d come home from the prom with Michael, and not J.P.

But I think she really is happy about Sarah Lawrence, too.

“Thanks,” I said.

But no one was happier than Grandmère.

“Sarah Lawrence,” Grandmère kept murmuring. “I was to go to Sarah Lawrence. If I hadn’t married Amelia’s grandfather. We’ve got to start planning how we’ll decorate her room. I think buttercup yellow walls. I was to have buttercup yellow walls…”

“Okay, then,” Michael said to me, eyeing Grandmère as she waxed on about buttercup yellow walls. “Wanna dance?”

“Do I ever,” I said, relieved to have an excuse to leave the table.

Which is how we ended up on the dance floor with my mom and Mr. G, dancing with Rocky and having a blast together, as usual; Lilly and Kenneth, doing some kind of new wave dance they seem to have invented themselves, even though the music was sort of slow; Tina and Boris, just holding each other, and gazing into each other’s eyes, the height of romance, as one would expect, since it was Tina and…well, Boris; and…my dad and Ms. Martinez.

“No,” I said, coming to a standstill when I saw this. “Just…no.”

“What?” Michael looked around. “What’s the matter?”

I should have expected it. I mean, they’d been dancing together at my birthday party, but I thought that had been a one-time thing.

It was at that point that my dad said something to Ms. Martinez and she slapped him across the face, then stalked off the dance floor.

I don’t think anyone could have been more stunned than my dad…except maybe my mom, who started laughing.

“Dad!” I exclaimed, horrified. “What did you say to her?”

My dad came over, rubbing the side of his face but looking more intrigued than actually hurt.

“Nothing,” he said. “I didn’t say anything to her. Well, nothing more than I usually say when I dance with a beautiful woman. It was a compliment, actually.”

“Dad,” I said. When would he ever learn? “She isn’t a lingerie model. She’s my former English teacher.”

“She’s intoxicating,” Dad said thoughtfully, gazing after her.

“Oh my God.” I groaned, and buried my face in Michael’s neck. I could see clearly what was going on. It was all too obvious. Not again! “Tell me this is not happening.”

“Oh, it’s happening,” Michael said. “He’s following her, calling after her…Did you know her first name was Karen?”

“I think I’m about to become more than well acquainted with that fact,” I said, still keeping my face in his neck and inhaling deeply.

“Yeah, now he’s heading across the parking lot after her…She’s trying to hail a taxi to get away but…oh, he’s stopped her. They’re talking. Oh, wait. She’s taking his hand…So, are you going to call her Ms. Martinez after they get married like you do Mr. Gianini, or do you think you’ll ever be able to call her Karen?”

“Seriously. What is wrong with my family?” I asked, with a groan.

“The same thing that’s wrong with everybody’s family,” Michael said. “It’s made up of human beings. Hey, quit sniffing me a minute and lift your head up.”

I lifted my head and looked at him. “Why?” I asked.

“So I can do this,” he said. And kissed me.

And as we were kissing, and the late-afternoon sun was pouring in all around us, and the other couples were swirling around us on the dance floor, laughing, I realized something. Something I think might be really important:

This princess thing, which four years ago I was convinced was going to be the ruination of my life, had turned out to be just the opposite. It’s actually taught me things, some of them very important. Like how to stand up for myself, and be my own person. How to get what I want out of life, on my own terms. And never to sit by my grandmother while crab is being served, since it’s her favorite dish, and she simply can’t eat it and talk at the same time, and half of it will end up all over whoever she’s sitting next to.

It’s taught me something else, too.