With whom? Those random subs you find at Lurid? The ones you choose because they remind you of Winter? Don't put her in the same category as those other women, asshole.
And this was most definitely not just another hookup for me. That much was a given, but from what she'd just told me, this wouldn't be a random hookup for her either, and that changed things. But everything was different with Winter, and it always had been. I needed to start being truthful with my feelings.
As I battled my demonic conscience, reconsidering just how many lines I would be crossing tonight with her, Winter brought me back into the moment by touching me again. This time her finger just pressed between my lips, suspending my runaway fears in a split second. "What kind of thoughts do you have about this girl?" she asked in a demure whisper.
"Filthy ones," I blurted. I pulled her off my lap and up onto the seat, where I could have her lips close to mine. "So very filthy, but right now I'm keeping a promise I made to myself earlier."
"What promise, James?"
"The one where your lips stay wet from my kisses all night long."
Touching my lips with her finger was Winter's way to ask me to kiss her without saying the words. Without a shadow of a doubt—and it was fucking hot. Beautiful perfect submission, and she wasn't even aware of it, which made it that much better. She'd given me so many clues in our recent interactions, and my theory was being confirmed bit by bit.
I closed the distance between our mouths and gave her what she wanted. It wasn't a crash of lips and tongues though, not at first. I needed to kiss her without time racing us forward impatiently. There was no rush. Just the two of us alone, and as much time as needed to get it right for once.
And I was determined to get it right for the rest of our trip to the Sherborn house. I could feel the warmth of her body heat, and the softness of her breasts shaping into my chest. All I wanted was to get closer to her.
I moved my lips away from hers to kiss her jaw and then her neck. I had so much skin to kiss before this night was over. So much more than just her pretty lips I realized, as I moved to the other side of her neck and licked a path back to her bottom lip. I took it between my teeth and bit down just enough for her to feel it. The moan that came out of her as she arched her body in my arms shot straight to my cock—she not only felt it…but she wanted it.
She wanted more, and I was going to give it to her. Fuck. Yes.
I hadn't been to my house in almost three months. Before tonight, I hadn't given the place much thought beyond questioning why I still paid caretaking services when I hardly ever used it. Mostly I pondered selling the fucking thing.
I bought it five years ago as a surprise for my fiancée. A place in the suburbs where we could start a family and do the grown-up shit people did when they got married.
Turned out I didn't need the big house in a private equestrian community with an empty barn waiting for a pony or two. Or situated within easy distance to the best schools. Providing for a family was no longer my concern. That ship had sailed to the benefit of all parties involved—fuck you very much.
So why had I held on to the house?
Not completely sure, except that I'd craved the idea of having a place nobody knew about, a sanctuary for whenever I needed one. I'd never told Leah or anyone in my family about this house. The deed wasn't even in my name, so it was completely off the grid, with the sole exception of my driver, Enzo. He knew about it because he lived in the guesthouse on the property and kept an eye on things for me.
My house was finally useful. It couldn't be more perfect for tonight with Winter.
"James, whose house is this?" she finally asked as I opened the front door and led her inside, grateful for the timed heating and lighting that kept it from feeling cold and dark.
"Mine."
"I didn't know you owned a house." She looked around at the mostly empty space, her eyes taking in the wood and stone and glass without comment. I so wished I knew what her thoughts were right now. Was she curious? Nervous? Scared to death of screwing this up between us like I was?
"Nobody knows, because I haven't told anyone before."
"When do you come here?" she asked, turning back toward me with the serious expression on her beautiful face.
"When I need a break."
"Is it often that you need a break?" she asked quietly.
"I haven't been to this house for months." Only the truth for her. "But I'm really happy that you're here now. I finally have you all to myself."
I backed her against the wall and settled my body against hers. Soft and quiet, and smelling so fucking wonderful with her whole body aligned with mine, I took a moment to breathe her in before I went insane. I could tell she was anticipating what I'd do next, but I had no intentions of rushing it. Not this first time anyway. Being with Winter was something I'd wanted for so damn long I ached. I couldn't even remember when my feelings had started. The wanting was something I recognized as a familiar companion. Always with me. Very well understood and accepted. I'd lived with it for years.
I never expected we might ever get to this point together.
I took her jaw in the palm of my hand and tilted it toward my lips. I smelled flowers mixed with oranges. The scent filtered into my senses where it would stay, because I was committing her to memory.
"Do you trust me?" I asked with my lips just out of reach of hers, so close but achingly much too far away.
"Yesss…always." I heard frustration loud and clear in her whispered words, and so did my cock. Painfully hard—and loving every second of the sweet torture of being so close to her.