She snorted. “I’ve had enough excitement to last me a lifetime, thank you very much.”
He sat beside her, gently pushing her hair back from her face. “When I think of how close I came to losing you and the little one…” his voice trailed off, actually cracking with his emotion.
“But you didn’t.” She grabbed hold of his hand, placing it on her belly. “We’re fine. The doctor said so.”
“And I’m going to make sure you stay that way.”
Jacey sighed. “It’s time to tell you everything, isn’t it?”
“Yes. I need to know it all.”
“Okay, where do I start?” she muttered to herself. She leaned back against the pillows he’d put behind her. “Well, if I’d had the courage, I would have left Stephan long before I did. When he first started abusing me, I should have packed up my bags and taken off.”
“Why didn’t you?”
“Because I thought that for once in my life I was doing the right thing by staying married to him. All my life I’d been a failure, a mistake. I was born the wrong sex, I wrecked my mother’s body so she couldn’t have other children, denying my parents the boy they’d always wanted.”
“Baby, you can’t know that.”
“Oh, but I do,” she said matter-of-factly. “Because they told me.”
Derrick clenched his hands against the anger rising through him. How could her parents have done that? Parents should protect and look after their children, love and guide them. Not destroy their self-esteem.
“When did they tell you this?”
“When I was eight years old and pestering them for a puppy,” she said. “My mother turned to me, told me that I was never getting a dog so I should stop asking. She said I should be thankful to get a roof over my head and food on my plate, and that the only reason they kept me around was for appearances. I wasn’t wanted, wasn’t loved and I wouldn’t ever get anything I asked for.”
Derrick felt like murdering the old bitch.
“I don’t think I ever asked for anything again.” She glanced at him and must have seen the rage on his face. “Oh, it wasn’t all bad. I received a fantastic education. I was sent to the best schools, I had ballet lessons and riding lessons, and despite her words, I never went hungry or without anything.”
Except love, affection, acceptance.
“I tried to make them notice me with
good grades, by doing everything they asked. Somehow it was never enough. Then one day, when I was home from College, my father brought home a young colleague of his. My father is a partner in a prestigious law firm.”
“Stephan was the young colleague?”
“Yes. Right away, he paid attention to me, he noticed me and for once my parents were pleased with me. It helped that Stephan seemed so charming and romantic. It was like he’d stepped right out of a romance book. He had a dominant streak, yet he could also be sensitive and caring. God, he had me fooled. I fell for him and I actually made my parents proud the day I married him.”
“Did you really fall for him or was it simply because for the first time you had your parents approval?” he asked.
She blinked, frowning. “Well, I’m not sure. A bit of both, maybe.”
“When he started abusing you, did you ever consider going to your parents for help?”
She blinked back tears. “No. I knew they wouldn’t help. They loved Stephan. As long as I was with him the relationship with my parents was better. Not great, but better.”
“Please don’t tell me that you stayed with him because of them.”
“Partly, maybe. I was too scared to leave him. I knew he wouldn’t let me go. I knew if I left that I would always be on the run, looking over my shoulder, afraid.”
“So what made you leave in the end?”
She cleared her throat, her distress easy to see.
“Baby, we can wait to do this if you’re not feeling up to it.”