Jardin's Gamble (Haven, Texas 9)

Carrick slumped into a chair. Jardin pulled out another and sat across from him. “I’m a flawed man, Carrick. I make mistakes. Big ones. But I hope I learn from them. And if there’s any chance you could ever forgive me . . .”

He knew Jardin’s faults. He liked to control everything around him because there was less chance he could be hurt that way. He also blamed himself when things went wrong. He also knew Jardin found it hard to believe that anyone could love him. Not after growing up in the household he had. There had been little love between his parents or for their children.

But could he forgive him for everything? He’d ripped out Carrick’s heart and stomped on it.

Except he never knew he had your heart. Because you’re guilty of not telling him shit. About your feelings. About how Sally treated you.

“Sally worked us both. She used to take jibes at me. About how I’d never fit into your life. About how I couldn’t be seen with you. About how lucky I was to be allowed to live in your house, to have you pay for me. Shit like that.”

“That fucking bitch,” Jardin growled. “Why didn’t you say anything?”

Carrick shrugged. “Guess we’ve both got too much pride for our own good.”

“And she knew how to play to our weaknesses like a pro.”

They were both silent for a long moment.

“So now you’re back.”

“You knew I left?” Carrick asked.

“I did.”

He should have known he would have. Carrick had moved to Alabama after their breakup. He nearly snorted at the use of that word. They hadn’t had that sort of relationship.

Not then anyway.

“I own my garage. Got a house.” He didn’t know exactly why he’d come back. Only that he’d never felt at home in Alabama. Never fit in.

Maybe you came back for Jardin.

“You really wanted me? You think you could be into me . . . like that? Fuck, I sound like a teenager with my first crush.” He could feel his cheeks growing red.

“Always loved how you could blush. Carrick, I’ve wanted you for a long time. I was a prick. A selfish asshole. And I get it if you can’t forgive me. But I hope like hell you’ll give me another chance. That you’ll let me show you my feelings for you, how much you mean to me.”

“We haven’t seen each other in two years. I might have changed.”

Jardin watched him guardedly. “I’m sure we both have. That’s not a bad thing.”

Might not be a good thing either. “We’ve both got a lot of baggage.”

Jardin nodded. “But we know what that baggage is. And I never make the same mistake twice. All I need is a chance. A chance to earn your forgiveness. To be with you. I’ll show you how much I still need you. I never stopped thinking of you. Wanting you.”

“You never came for me.”

Jardin grimaced. “Not true.”

Shock filled Carrick and he straightened. “What are you talking about?”

“I tracked you down, about three months after you left. Got a PI to find you— ”

“I wasn’t hiding.”

“No. I know.”

“What happened? You changed your mind?”

Jardin cleared his throat. “When I got there, you were shutting up the garage. This woman came up to you. Big, blonde hair, short, red skirt.”