Jardin's Gamble (Haven, Texas 9)
Page 60
“I need to make a call to Thea, let her know I’m not going to be in and to move my appointments.”
Carrick nodded, watching as Jardin walked away. Was he doing the right thing? Letting him back into his life? Then again, had it been much of a life without Jardin in it? The other man had hurt him badly. But would he have walked away without a fight if he hadn’t let Sally gouge a huge hole in his self-esteem? If he’d just opened up to Jardin, maybe they could have avoided the mess that came later.
Sally’s death. Jardin’s words. So much pain.
Maybe it wouldn’t end well again. But, this time, there was honesty between them at least. Jardin’s revelation had been a shock, and he still wasn’t entirely sure he knew what he was getting himself into. But he’d suffered through his family trying to tell him how to feel when he’d first come out. He still didn’t talk to them because of it. No way was he telling Jardin how to feel.
That wasn’t the only thing niggling away at him, though. This was new, yes. And he got that they should focus on the two of them. But then there was Thea.
Thea, who he couldn’t stop thinking about.
Thea, who had looked confused and worried. And scared.
Thea, who’d run out of the restaurant as though the hounds of hell were on her heels.
None of that sat right with him. But was Jardin interested in her? And would it be fair to bring her in to a relationship that was just starting off? Even though they’d known each other for years, and though they’d shared a woman, they’d never been in a relationship together.
No, they needed a solid foundation first, then they could think about Thea.
Except he couldn’t get her out of mind. He needed to talk to her, explain things. Find out why she’d never answered his messages.
“Everything okay?”
He glanced up as Jardin walked in and moved over to where he was leaning against the kitchen counter.
Carrick took him in. Fuck, he was hot. The man oozed power and authority. Yet, Carrick knew he had a softer side too. He just didn’t let many people see it.
“Changed your mind?” Vulnerability entered Jardin’s gaze.
“Fuck. No.” Carrick reached out and drew him close, holding him against his chest. His cock hardened, thickened at the feel of Jardin’s body against his. “I want this. Want it so much it’s fucking scary.”
“I know what you mean,” Jardin admitted. “I’m scared as well.”
“Didn’t think much ever scared the great Jardin Malone.”
“Yeah, well, the great Jardin Malone isn’t so great. He’s just a man who wants his best friend to love him again.”
Carrick groaned. “Fuck that’s hot.”
“What is?”
“You. Letting down your guard. Letting me the fuck in. I want you.”
“Me too.”
“Is it moving too fast?”
Jardin shrugged. “Not like we haven’t known each other for years.”
That didn’t mean they should immediately jump into bed with each other. Still, he couldn’t resist leaning down to kiss the other man. Reaching around, he squeezed his firm ass.
“Fuck, Carrick,” Jardin muttered. “You’re killing me.”
“You sure you’re ready for this?”
“Fuck, yes. What the hell do you think I’ve been jerking off to for the past two years?”
“You dreamed about me?” Carrick asked.