Horizon (The Soul Seekers 4)
Page 29
Her brilliant green eyes blaze with conviction, clearly she believes every word. The sarcasm and cynicism from the morning eclipsed by her love for me.
I press my thumbs to her cheekbones, smooth them across her soft, smooth skin. The feel of her causing an unbearable ache to stream through my body, as the beast thrums and pulsates within. His constant hum a bitter reminder of how after tonight, I’ll never be this close to her again.
“Turns out I was wrong,” I say, my voice tight, choked, on the verge of breaking. “There is something stronger than love, something that’s ready, able, and all too willing to conquer us both—and it lives inside me. Try as I might, I can’t control it, Daire. The beast has its own life force, its own agenda, and it won’t be long until it completely overwhelms me. I need you to believe me when I say that you will all be better off without me.”
Despite my warnings, she remains undeterred. “Fine. I hear you,” she says. “But that doesn’t mean I have to go along with your plan. You can say goodbye to our friends, but you can’t say goodbye to me. I won’t give up on us, Dace. Not now, not ever.”
Her eyes find mine and we hold the look much longer than we should. Reluctant to relinquish the cache of dreams that, thanks to fate, we’ll never get a chance to experience.
She’s made her vow, and I’ve made mine—both of us led by our hearts. When I swore I would do whatever it took to save her, I meant every word. And as hard as this moment is, the saving starts now. The longer I stay, the more I risk putting her in harm’s way.
I fold her hands in mine, pressing for one, sweet, brief moment before I release her for good and my arms fall cold and alie
n to my sides. “I left a bag by my place on the couch. I purposely left it there because I want you to have what’s inside. I also want you to show Axel, Lita, Auden, and Xotichl how to use it. I want you to train them until they’re proficient. And, when the time comes, I want you to give them firm instructions to use it on me.” She starts to protest, but this time, it’s my turn to hush her. “No hesitations. No second guesses. From what I’ve seen, that time will come, and I want you all to be ready when it does.”
We’ve come to an impasse, with me determined to leave, and her determined to save me. And as hard as it is, it’s my job to see this thing through.
Without another word, I lower my head and press my lips gently to hers. Hoping the kiss will convey what words can’t—my undying love—my deepest regrets. Then I pull away just as quickly and hurry down the path, resisting the urge to look back.
FOURTEEN
DAIRE
I press my back against the door, relying on it for support as I watch Dace cross the stone-and-gravel path, make his way through the gate, and disappear from my life. And despite a house full of friends, the truth is, I’ve never felt so alone.
First my abuela. Now Dace.
I’m not sure how much more I can take.
That’s the thing about loss—no matter how often one experiences it, it never gets any easier.
And yet, this is nothing like losing my abuela. While my grandmother has left the physical world, Dace is still firmly entrenched right here within it. As long as he remains among the living, I won’t relinquish the dream of a future together.
Where there’s life, there’s hope. And despite what he says, I’m determined to get through this.
It’s just like I told him, Seekers have always worked from the heart—and I see no reason to change that.
I take a moment to compose myself, run a hand through my hair, and dry my tears with the back of my hand. Then I head inside and face my friends, and hoping to hide the pain of what I’ve just gone through, I keep it nonchalant when I say, “While I’m still up for pizza, I think the movies might have to wait.”
Collectively, they stare at me, until Axel is the first to speak. “Daire, is Dace okay?”
I nod. Feign a brighter look than I thought I was capable of.
“And you? You okay too?” Xotichl leans forward, studies me intently.
I take a moment to look at each of them, ensuring I have their full attention. “I am. I’m better than okay. And you know why?”
Lita groans loudly, paces before the giant rock jutting boldly from the middle of the wall. “Daire—you don’t have to pretend to be strong on our account.” She shoots me a knowing look. “We know perfectly well what just happened out there. After saying goodbye to us, Dace proceeded to say goodbye to you and break your heart. You gotta be dying inside and it’s okay to show it. We’re your friends, you don’t ever have to hide your feelings from us.”
I shake my head and dismiss the thought with an impatient wave of my hand. There’s no point in indulging my heartbreak. Not when I have every intention of getting Dace back.
“Don’t blame Dace,” I say. “He did what he thought was right. He’s only trying to protect us.”
“Protect us from himself ?” Auden cuts in, clearly struggling to grow used to the idea of Dace being dangerous. “Because deep down inside he’s not what he appears to be?”
I avert my gaze, reach for the fresh glass of iced tea they poured for me. Hoping they don’t notice the way my hand trembles as I bring the glass to my lips.
“Daire, what’s going on here?” Lita settles against the rock with her arms folded defiantly across her chest. “You’re taking this way too calmly. Is there something you’re not telling us? Because in my admittedly limited experience, prophecies are rarely wrong, and this particular prophecy is about as bad as they come.”