She tilts her chin and narrows her eyes, looking angry, defiant, though her voice easily betrays the fear that’s behind it. “I don’t know what you’re up to, Ever, but you need to stop! You need to stop with the…” She looks around, searches for the right word. “You need to stop with the magic tricks, now!”
Her demeanor so shaken, so stricken, I’m quick to comply. Nodding and blinking until every last trace of it’s gone—until it’s al returned to normal again, including my clothes, which are back to the far more comfortable, though far less impressive blue dress and beige sandals.
My eyes meet hers, and I can’t help but think this is going even worse than I’d thought. Stil , I refuse to give up. I can’t al ow myself to stop now when I stil have a few more tricks up my sleeve.
“There’s more.” I nod, instantly manifesting a jewel-handled knife I position right over my flattened, raised palm. “I know you’re squeamish, I know how you hate the sight of blood, but I promise it’l be over soon.”
I jab the tip into the center of my palm, and drag the sharp blade al the way across. Hearing the gasp Sabine is unable to stifle, and seeing her horrified face as she watches the blood pouring out of me—the way it splashes over my dress and pools onto the carpet—
until—until—it no longer is.
The knife is gone.
My palm is healed.
And there’s absolutely no sign of the blood I just shed.
And even though it was a pretty impressive display, I have to admit I’m starting to feel a little ashamed, starting to feel like the world’s creepiest circus act.
“Listen.” I glance back and forth between her and Munoz, who’s not even trying to hide his shock over what he just saw. “I could go on for hours. I could show you every trick that I’m capable of. And I wil , if that’s what it takes. But real y, al you need to know is that everything you just saw is real. And though it may make you uncomfortable, while it may make you long to turn your back and pretend you didn’t see it, that won’t stop it from being real. I’m sorry, Sabine. I’m sorry to have to do this to you. And while I get that it’s your choice whether or not you choose to believe, and while I get that there’s a good chance that no matter what I do I won’t be able to change your mind, here’s the thing: Whether or not you choose to believe is entirely up to you—but if you ever want to see me again, if you want to have any kind of a relationship with me, then you’re going to have to move past your own deeply rooted prejudices and learn to accept me. Al of me. Even the parts you don’t like. Even the parts that scare you. Because that’s exactly what I’ve chosen to do with you. Your tendency toward self-righteousness and bul headedness, your penchant for shunning me instead of trying to understand me, wel , it scares me just as much as my display of immortal party tricks just scared you. Yet I stil prefer to accept you as you are, rather than face a future of never seeing you again. I guess I was just hoping that by doing al this, we could find a place to meet in the middle.
But again, it’s your choice. Either way, I’l accept your decision.”
I sit back, watching as the steam seeps right out of her, watching as her aura deflates and settles like a week-old helium bal oon.
“How long have you been like this?” she final y asks.
And when my eyes meet hers, I realize she thinks I’ve always been like this—that I was born a freak. Figuring it must be the reason I survived the accident when the rest of my family didn’t. Though I’m quick to deflect that.
“I did die in the accident,” I say. “I had what’s cal ed a near-death experience, though I think the term’s a little wonky since there was nothing near about it. Anyway, Munoz probably knows more about al that than I do. He’s read up on it quite a bit.” I look at them, seeing her shoot him an inquiring glance, which he answers with a nod and a shrug. “Anyway, instead of crossing the bridge to the other side along with Mom and Dad and Buttercup, I chose to linger in Summerland, in this amazingly beautiful field. And that’s what my soul was doing when Damen found my body by the car and made me drink the elixir that brought me to life.”
“And Riley?” Sabine leans forward, her eyes wide, assuming the worst.
“Riley got stuck for a while.” I squirm.
“Stuck?”
I sigh. “Stuck between here and Summerland. She started visiting me back when I was in the hospital. Then, when we moved here, she used to drop by the house nearly every day until I convinced her to cross the bridge and move on. And though I think she might visit me in my dreams every now and then, I haven’t been able to see her since. I can’t see the ones who’ve crossed over. Their energy vibrates too fast. Though a friend of mine used to see her…” I pause, remembering how Jude tried to teach me to see her too, but to no avail. “And he says she says she’s just fine. Actual y, he says she’s better than fine. She’s happy. Mom and Dad and Buttercup are happy too. Apparently they feel more alive than ever.” I look at her. “You know, just because you can’t see them, doesn’t mean they no longer exist. The soul is eternal. It’s the only true immortality there is.”
I don’t know which part of my speech final y got to her, but the next thing I know Sabine is sobbing into Munoz’s T-shirt. Her shoulders violently shaking as he rubs his hand over her chin-length blond hair and down the back of her blouse, whispering softly, providing comfort, assurance, until she starts to col ect herself and is ready to face me again.
I sit quietly, knowing exactly how she feels. Remembering al too wel how I first reacted when I saw my ghostly little sister standing before me—how I denied it was real. And how I treated Damen that day in the parking lot at school when he first told me the truth of my existence—how I chose to banish him from my life, to send him away with cruel, fear-driven words rather than face a truth I felt so completely unprepared to handle.
We’re not so different, Sabine and me.
I know what it’s like to have everything you believe turned upside down.
So after a while I say, “I’m real y sorry to just spring this on you. I know it’s a lot to digest. But I just wanted you to know before—”
She lifts her head, her eyes bleary, teary, as she turns to face me.
“—I just wanted you to know before I return to normal again.”
She blinks, shakes her head, and mumble
s, “What?” Swiping a sleeve across her face when she adds, “I don’t understand.”
I take a deep breath and gaze down at my feet, stal ing for a moment, gathering my words, before I return my gaze to hers. “To be honest, I’m not sure that I understand either. It’s such a long story, and there’s so much to explain … but it’s not like the details are al that important anyway. I just thought, wel , I just hoped that if I came clean about who I am now, then maybe, when I’m no longer like this, we can stil hang out together. You know, without al the yel ing and fighting and name-cal ing. I mean, if you want. It’s pretty much up to you. I promise to respect whatever you decide.”