Something Rotten (Thursday Next 4)

'Empty metaphorically or empty literally?'

'Empty as in no one goes there except water officials - and we have wholly uncorroborated evidence which we peddle as fact that an unspecified number of officials have vanished without trace. In any event it's all off limits to everyone, surrounded by an electrified fence.'

'To keep people out?'

'No,' said Millon slowly, 'to keep whatever genetic experiments Goliath were working on in. The whole of Area 21 is infested with chimeras. I've got files and files of dubious stories about people breaking in, allegedly never to be seen again. What's your interest in the Elan plant anyway?'

'Illegal genetic experiments on humans undertaken covertly by an apparently innocent multinational.'

Millon nearly passed out with conspiracy overload. When he had recovered he asked how he could help.

'I need you to find any pictures, plans, layout drawings, anything that might be of use for a visit.'

Millon opened his eyes wide and scribbled on his notepad.

'You're going to go into Area 21?'

'No.' I replied, 'we both are. Tomorrow. Leaving here at seven in the morning, sharp. Can you find what I asked for?'

He narrowed his eyes.

'I can get you your information, Miss Next,' he said slowly and with a gleam in his eye, 'but it will cost. Let me be your official biographer.'

I put out a hand and he shook it gratefully.

'Deal.'

I walked back inside to find Landen talking to a man dressed in slightly punky clothes, brightly coloured spectacle frames, bleached blond hair and an infinitesimally small goatee firmly planted just under his lower lip.

'Darling,' he said, grasping the hand that I had just rested on his shoulder, 'this is my very good friend Handley Paige.'

I shook his hand. He seemed pretty much the same as any other SF writers I had ever met. Slightly geeky but pleasant enough.

'You write the Emperor Zhark books,' I observed.

He winced slightly.

'No one ever talks about the decent stuff I write,' he moaned, 'they just ask me for more and more Zhark stuff. I did it as a joke — a pastiche of bad science fiction, and blow me down if it isn't the most popular thing I've ever done.'

I remembered what Emperor Zhark had told me.

'You're going to kill him off, aren't you?'

Handley started.

'How did you know that?'

'She works for SO-27,' explained Landen, 'they know everything.'

'I thought you guys were more hooked on the classics?'

'We deal with all genres,' I explained. 'For reasons that I can't reveal, I advise you to maroon Zhark on an uninhabited planet rather than submit him to the humiliation of a public execution.'

Handley laughed.

'You talk about him as if he were a real person!'

'She takes her work very seriously, Handley,' said Landen without the glimmer of a smile. 'I'd advise you to consider very seriously anything she happens to say. Wheels within wheels, Handley.'