Fallout (Crank 3)

No, no, no! It’s bad

enough working a remote

with Rick the Brick Denio,

whose “I’m God’s gift

to the world” attitude

has thirty years in radio

to back it up. Montana’s

“hey, I’m the shit” pose

comes from bottled

blond hair and way-

too-round-to-be-real

36DDs. And, fake or

no, those babies were

designed for Montana

Disney (no lie!) to steal

the show wherever she goes.

ESPECIALLY FOOTBALL GAMES

Especially with those DDs

encased in a gray angora sweater,

and her equally impressive ass

advertised by a short, tight navy

skirt. Wolf Pack colors are silver

and blue. She’s a one-of-a-kind fan,

one every guy walking by can’t help

but notice. It’s irritating, but what

really pisses me off is how she just

stands there, flaunting fuzzy silver

and tight navy blue, while I do all

the work, setting up the X tailgate

party. Even Rick would have helped.