The tone of voice was Father’s “what did you think?” and, just as if he were still a child, it made Noxon feel hopelessly stupid.
“It’s not as if you can do any of this,” said Noxon. And, for having responded like a child, he now felt that he deserved to feel stupid.
“You can do what you can do,” said Father, “and I can do what I can do.”
“I don’t know what I’m doing,” said Noxon.
“No one ever does,” said Father. “But at least we expendables always know what we did. You humans can’t even hold on to your memories, just the echo of a shadow of a dream.”
Noxon didn’t bother arguing. “You are superior in every way,” he said placidly. “I’m content with my second-rate yet biologically active state.”
“And every bug is content to be a bug.”
“Proud to be a bug, and don’t you forget it.”
“I won’t,” said Father.
Noxon laughed. “I’m having so much fun, it makes me want to kill and skin a beast of some kind. Just for old times’ sake.”
“Old times,” said Father. “I don’t suppose you want to take me back to the beginning with you.”
“Then there’d be two of you in Ramfold, and no way to hide you from your old self.”
“I just want to know what happens,” said Father. “You can understand my curiosity.”
“No, I can’t,” said Noxon. “That’s such a human emotion.”
“It’s in my programming. I have to know.”
; “And yet you won’t.”
“But the mice will,” said Father.
“If I decide to bring them,” said Noxon.
“And if you don’t?”
“We can’t have them infesting Ramfold,” said Noxon. “They know that. So if I go, and I leave them behind, it’s your job to make sure they never get off this ship.”
“My job to kill them.”
“You’ve done it before,” said Noxon. “After all, you’re expendable yourself.”
“But you’re going to take them,” said Father.
“I haven’t decided.”
“But you are.”
“I’ve killed and skinned a thousand animals. More. Do you think the deaths of these mice will bother me?”
“Yes,” said Father.
“Well, you’re right. And I’m taking them. If I die, they die. If I live, they’ll share my fate.”
“They’re not saying anything about your magnanimous decision,” said Father.