No.
Sick to his stomach, he shook his head as the guilt overwhelmed every other feeling. He should have been there. He should have protected her. “I’m sorry,” he choked out.
“Stu came into the pool house. He said he’d been having a smoke by the pool and he heard me cry out for help. The next thing I knew, Caruthers had been pulled off me and Stu hit him repeatedly over the head with one of the dumbbells.”
“Jesus fuck.” Jack shook his head, trying to make sense of this new truth.
“He didn’t mean to kill him.” Her expression was so sad. “Jack, he was as shaken up as me. He’d just … he was trying to protect me.” Fresh tears fell from her eyes. “He didn’t know what to do. He was so scared. So he called Ian. And he took care of everything. He blamed it on me. Said I was a stupid whore for bringing Caruthers back to the house.”
“He said what?”
“I … I was stupid, Jack. Looking for love in all the wrong places. But I never meant … I just thought we’d hang out.”
“You were only seventeen. Of course that’s what you thought! Do not blame yourself. Do you hear me?”
She nodded. “Stu was angry at Ian for saying that. He assured me he didn’t blame me.”
Disbelief moved through Jack.
Rebecca continued, “But Ian used it against us all, didn’t he? Even Stu. He held it over him. Made him do things … like break into Bailey’s inn.”
“How do you know that?”
“He told me. You know he called me every month to see how I was doing.”
“That doesn’t excuse him punching her.”
“I know. Stu knew that. Jack, he was so angry. He didn’t know how to control it. So he got high whenever it got too much. He was high that night he broke into the Bailey’s. But more than that, he had too much of Ian in him. He knew that too. He just let the anger turn him into his father. I …I think I was the only person he was ever truly himself with.”
Jack’s chest tightened with too much emotion. He struggled to draw breath. “Why didn’t you tell me? Why didn’t he tell me? I could have helped you both.”
“You couldn’t. We both knew that. If I told the truth, Ian would manipulate it so that you went down for it. And Stu knew you wouldn’t care about protecting him, but you would care about protecting me, so he suggested we lie about what happened. He knew Ian would figure out a way to take you down for it. Planting fingerprints on the weapon. Whatever it took.”
“But Stu was … we were constantly at each other’s throats. Why didn’t he talk to me?”
“He loved us in his own way. That’s all you need to know. Everything else will just make you crazy with what-ifs. He’d want us to both be free now, Jack. And even if I have to do time for aiding and abetting, it doesn’t matter. We’ve been in a version of prison for almost five years. I … I’ve been … there were some days I … I didn’t even want to be here anymore.”
Horror suffused him. “Becca—”
“This is the only way I know how to live with it. Caruthers was an evil bastard … but I can’t live with the secret anymore and what it’s taken from you. I feel lighter than I have in years.” She offered him a sad smile. “And you … you’re free of all this now. You can leave Ian behind. Finally.”
“You know Ian won’t take this lying down.”
“Yeah.” She smirked. “So, you’re telling me you haven’t been keeping tabs on every dirty thing he’s ever done?”
It surprised him he could laugh in that moment. His sister knew him too well.
“You have evidence, don’t you?”
Jack’s laughter faded into a smile. “And if I have?”
“Then I would suggest handi
ng that evidence over to our friendly local detective. You can offer your cooperation in exchange for immunity.”
The idea of being free didn’t seem real. The possibility of seeing Ian brought down for all the shitty things he’d done to their family and this community over the years seemed like a dream. And there was only one thing standing in Jack’s way.
“We do that, and it’s not just Ian who goes down. Kerr goes down too. And what about Mom and Jamie?” Jamie, their youngest brother, was a freshman in college. Despite Ian’s attempts to beat him down, he was proving to be more like Jack and Rebecca. In other words, he’d gotten a lot of Rosalie’s genes.