It was on the tip of my tongue to blurt out that I was pregnant.
I wouldn’t.
One, Jack needed to know first.
Two, I was only seven weeks. I didn’t want to announce anything at all until further along in the pregnancy. As much as I was in turmoil about what my future looked like as a single mom, I’d quickly fallen in love with the idea of being a mother. I’d have a son or daughter. To raise, protect, and love. And although I’d never planned to do it this way, I wanted it now. And I wanted nothing to take that away.
But I knew things could happen. I knew babies could go away. Seven weeks was too soon to tell anyone. It might jinx my pregnancy. I could almost hear my grandmother scolding me for such a superstitious thought (after scolding me for getting pregnant out of wedlock, that is). Yet I couldn’t change how concerned I was. I’d hold off telling anyone until it got too hard to hide. I’d have to ask Jack to do the same.
My stomach roiled again at the thought of telling Jack.
I needed to tell him soon. I had planned to.
Yet now that I knew he’d be at the wedding, I wasn’t sure I wanted to be stuck at the same event with him if he knew the truth.
“You look a little pale suddenly. Are you okay, Em?”
“I had food poisoning yesterday.” I perpetuated my lie. “Still feeling a little off.”
“Oh, sweetie, that’s not good. Why don’t you just close the store today?”
“I’d rather work through it.” I couldn’t look at her as I lied. “So, are we all ready for the big day?” I changed the subject.
“Yes. All set. My parents arrive tomorrow and are no longer giving me a guilt trip for rescinding Vanessa’s invite.” At my look of concern, Bailey waved me off. “She was never going to show anyway. And it’s better I know the truth. Am I sad? Yes. But I won’t let it ruin my wedding. Mom and Dad and Charlie get it. So, they’ll all be here tomorrow, and Vaughn’s dad and the rest of his guests will arrive the night before. They’re all booked into the hotel. The staff are working harder than ever because it’s the boss’s wedding, so I feel like we’re in excellent hands.” She smiled. “And all you need to do is show up at the inn on the eve of the big day.”
“I can’t wait.”
I was also glad Vaughn and Bailey had had their bachelor and bachelorette parties months ago. There had been much drinking involved. At least this way, I could avoid a glass of champagne if Bailey had wedding-eve drinks without it being weirdly noticeable.
“Me neither.”
As soon as Bailey left to deliver Dahlia’s coffee, I let out a shaky exhale.
I couldn’t tell Jack about the baby. Not until after the wedding. That way, I wouldn’t be trapped in the same room with him for hours while he had that knowledge.
26
Emery
Bailey and Vaughn had taken over Main Street.
Literally.
They’d gotten permission to block the street, and car owners were asked to move their vehicles the day before in preparation for the wedding. Why? Because the ceremony was taking place at the gazebo at the top of Main Street. The many guest chairs were set out in front of the gazebo, down onto the street. It meant anyone who didn’t get an official invite could watch from a distance.
The chairs wore white linen coverings and bows the color of pink cherry blossoms. A white aisle strewn with cherry-blossom petals had been laid between the chairs and all the way up to the gazebo and altar. The gazebo’s pillars had been wrapped in fresh-flower garlands of white roses and pink peonies.
The sun shone brightly.
The waves sparkled in the distance.
Tourists wavered on the boardwalk, cameras out, taking shots of the beautiful bride and groom as they recited their vows.
Sitting in the front row beside Jess, Dahlia, and Ivy in our matching pale-pink bridesmaid gowns, I stared up at Bailey and Vaughn feeling a strange mix of joy and envy. The way he gazed at her was awe-inspiring. Like he couldn’t believe she was real and that she was his.
I wanted that for Bailey. I was overjoyed for her.
Yet, I was afraid I might never find the same.