Welcome to E. Mayberry

Women cursed, men howled, and I yelled, “Ohhh yaaaaasssss!”

The man in my mouth never reached orgasm and as I came I realized I’d become that stingy one, what I’d complained about most during sixty-nine encounters, the unwilling participant who’d gotten selfish in his own pleasure. So it wasn’t only a guy thing, I’d just never been pleased enough during the act to be able to forget about my partner.

The wolf who’d eaten me pulled his cock away from me and lay down next to me on the grass.

“Paul, remember?” he said.

I should have known. Paul the champion of cunt cleaning, the sorcerer of snatch, the pauper of pussy, the…oh you fucking get it. He was the best pussy eater I’d ever met in my entire life. I wanted a Paul of my own to hang in the closet the same way you want a vacuum cleaner to clean your carpets when you need it or an iron ready to press your clothes. I wanted a Paul to eat my pussy for me whenever I was feeling low.

Fireworks went off overhead and I couldn’t think of a better time for it to happen. It had been an amazing day and Paul had ended it for me the perfect way. I already couldn’t wait for the next Harvest Festival. Pink and blue and orange flowers of light illuminated the field and I saw couples all around us pointing at the sky.

After the big finale, that rapid fire of sky flowers, Kendall was back on the microphone and I realized the festival wasn’t over.

“Well that was awesome wasn’t it?” she said.

We all cheered.

“Now’s the real finale. Let’s all head back to the stage. You can clean up or get dressed or whatever you want, but meet me at the stage in ten minutes for the last portion of the festival before we all head home and call it a great end to another year here in Erotic Mayberry.”

The spotlights stayed off so we could all find the lit up stage easily. I did search for my clothes. It seemed right to get dressed. Trust me, I thought I’d never say this, but I’d had about all the sex I could handle for one day. Every single thing about the festival had turned me on so far and I needed a

chance to soothe my aching pussy. So I went back to the bouncy house and found my shorts and shirt lying on the grass, now completely dry after being baked in the sun all day, and got dressed.

Bastian met me and got dressed too. Then we headed to the stage where a large screen had been pulled down and a projector was on at its base. The words “Welcome to the Erotic Mayberry Harvest Festival” were lit up on the screen.

“Everyone here?” Kendall asked, now dressed in a tight black dress that sparkled in the spotlights. “Come on stragglers. We’ve got to hurry up and finish this so all you horny sons a bitches can go home and fuck till the sun comes up. Yes, I know, even that is tradition.”

“More like a habit!” someone yelled.

“So this is the part of the night where we recognize certain people and situations we’ve encountered throughout the year,” Kendall said. “It’s like our short and sweet version of the Oscar’s. Vivi, please bring me the envelopes.”

Vivi walked out on stage wearing a nice purple formal gown. I felt way too underdressed but compared to the people around me, some of which were still naked, I was doing okay.

“Here are the nominees for the funniest on-screen argument,” Kendall said as she stepped aside and pointed at the screen.

The screen went black and then flashed to a scene from the bedroom video cameras of two people arguing. The woman was yelling at the man.

“I said come in my mouth!” she yelled. “You came in my fucking eye!”

The man only shrugged his shoulders and stifled his laughter.

The crowd around us laughed.

The screen went black and then flashed to the two gay women who’d played the Guess Who game. The one who’d gone behind the wall to wear the strap-on yelled at her girlfriend, “You know how I like Fruity Pebbles. If you want to eat all the fucking Captain Crunch, eat it. But stay the fuck away from my Fruity Pebbles.”

The girlfriend looked at her and said, “I’m gonna eat all your Fruity Pebbles next time too since you’re being such a bitch about it.”

Again, the crowd laughed.

The screen went black and then flashed to a couple arguing. The man looked disgusted.

“Just because we’ve been together for five years doesn’t mean you should shit with the bathroom door open,” he said. “I don’t want to be fucking you later and imagine your pooping face. You know?”

Her mouth hung open in shock. The screen froze on that image. Everyone laughed.

“And the winner for the funniest on-screen argument goes to…Grant and Becky, don’t shit with the door open!”

The couple walked up on stage. He was naked and she was wearing a long buttoned up flannel shirt. I could imagine how embarrassed she felt. To win an award for crapping with the door open? Wow. Kendall hugged them both and handed them an envelope. I figured it probably had money or a gift card or something in it.