Sure, he could make up excuses, but he’d known ordering that report had been wrong, which was why he hadn’t read it in the first place.
Why had he ordered that stupid report?
Her chest rose and fell rapidly, and she stood her ground, not moving.
Every muscle in his body ached.
Now was not the time to get emotional, to lose control. A calm, clear head was necessary, and he needed to fix this fuck-up before she walked out the door.
“Are you going to say anything? Or are you just going to stand there, staring at nothing?”
“What can I say?” He gritted his teeth. “You’re pissed at me, and you have every right to be. You’re betrayed, and it’s my fault. I could be a guy and make excuses and try to make you forgive me, but we both know I fucked up, and I’m sorry. I’ll stand here and let you yell at me, and I’ll take it, because I deserve
it, but once you’re done, I’ll do my best to make it up to you. And make no mistake, Sam—I will make this up to you.”
“I don’t want you to,” she growled.
He inclined his head. “But I will. I’m not going to lose you or let you push me away. Not after how far we’ve come.”
“You already lost me, and you don’t get to tell me whether I can leave or not,” she rasped, biting her lip. “You shouldn’t have ordered that report.”
“I know, that’s why I never read it.”
She crossed her arms. “Allegedly.”
“I didn’t read it, and I won’t.”
He’d been nothing but honest with her, while she’d been hiding all sorts of shit about her past, and in this she refused to believe him. He tried not to let it bother him, since he was in the wrong here, but it did.
“Let me do it for you.” She picked it up, advancing on him. “My parents stole millions of dollars from their company, from people who trusted them, robbing their employees of their retirement funds, and stocks, and 401(k)s so horribly that a company like yours had to take control, lay off hundreds of jobs, and ruin lives. On top of that, as if that wasn’t enough, they also stole from the charity they’d created to help orphaned children—ironic, since through their actions, I became one.”
His chest tightened. “You don’t have to do this.”
“Clearly, I do.” She slapped him on the chest with the envelope. He kept his hands at his sides, refusing to take it. “You want to know so badly you paid someone to do the digging around for you, and he did it in such a timely manner, too. I mean, he had this report finalized two days after we met? That’s impressive.”
He stared straight ahead, focusing on the window. The city lights. Anything but her, because if he saw the pain and accusation in her eyes, he might lose the tiny grasp on his self-control he still clutched. “He’s good at what he does.”
“I’m sure he is.” She tossed it on the couch, since he didn’t take it. “It couldn’t have been easy for him. I changed my last name and had the records sealed.”
“You did?” he asked, trying to keep his tone flat.
She had a different last name. Jesus.
“Yeah, because I wanted a fresh start, I wanted a life where no one knew who my parents were or what they’d done.” She pushed her hair out of her face, more than likely blinking rapidly in an attempt to hold back tears. “I didn’t want people to know my shame.”
She might as well have punched him in the gut with a spiked fist. He couldn’t breathe. Couldn’t move. Couldn’t… “It’s not your fault, and it’s not your shame,” he said, breaking his rule and looking at her. He shouldn’t have, because he’d been right. It killed him. “You didn’t steal that money. They did.”
“I spent it, though. God, did I spend it.”
He reached for her hand. “You didn’t know.”
“It doesn’t matter,” she snapped, slipping out of his reach. His hand was so damn empty without hers inside it. He fisted it, digging his fingers into his palm until it hurt. “Sins of the father, and all that. I might have been a kid, and I might not have known where all that money came from, but I will always be guilty by association. I will always be judged for what they did.”
“Not by me,” he said, his voice cracking. “Never by me.”
“But by everyone else.” She swallowed hard, for the first time losing the shield of anger she’d been clinging to, and what could only be described as fear was in her eyes. “Could you walk into a room of your peers, with me, the daughter of two federally convicted embezzlers, on your arm?”
He frowned. “I wouldn’t give a damn.”