He was spot on, and he knew it.
At her silence, he took his spoon and scooped up some of his meal.
They ate in silence, neither breaking it. When she finished, she leaned back in her chair, picked up her soda, and watched him. His shoulders were tense, and his jaw was hard. She knew him well en
ough to know that his jerky motions were signs of annoyance. He didn’t like that she thought he’d still been sleeping around. She, stupidly, liked that he didn’t like that.
So what are you gonna do about it? her inner voice taunted.
Clearing her throat, she broke the silence. “I don’t want you to sleep around, but it would definitely be easier on me if you did,” she admitted. “I don’t want to want you, Eric.”
He pushed his plate away. “Then don’t.”
“I’ve tried that. But then I do something stupid like ask you to kiss me, and once I voiced that desire out loud, it was like it took on a whole new life of its own.” She stared at his mouth, licking her lips. She was doing it again. Thinking about kissing him. Judging from the way he shifted in his chair, he noticed. “I can’t stop wondering what it would feel like to have your mouth on mine.”
He stood, his body stiff, and walked over to her. “If you want to find out, all you have to do is ask.”
“That would be a horrible idea.” She stood, her body trembling, and rested her hands on his chest. He was so hard under his crisp cotton shirt. “The worst.”
“Everyone needs to make bad decisions sometimes.” He gripped her hips, pulling her closer in one tug. “I don’t think we’re bad, though.”
“But—”
“I see you, Shel. I see the way you look at me, and underneath those gorgeous blue eyes of yours is a desire to live. And you know what? I feel it, too. With you. I’ve lived a hell of a lot. Done stupid shit. Made mistakes. But with you, I feel like I’m alive for the first time in years. When you look at me, I recognize that same look in your eyes, that same feeling that this thing between us could be amazing. So unless you can look me in the eye, right now, and tell me I’m wrong, I’m not giving up on you. I’ll keep waiting until you see what’s in front of you. What’s been here since the second I looked up from my busy life and finally saw you.”
She fisted his shirt. “I do see it. That’s the problem.”
“It’s only a problem if you let it be,” he said.
“Eric…”
He brushed his lips across her cheek, right next to her mouth. “I know. It hurts, right? The ache inside of you?”
She didn’t say anything, just nodded once.
“I feel it, too. All the damn time.”
Her breath hitched in her throat. “You do?”
“Hell, yeah, and I only know one way to make it go away.”
“And that is?” she asked, lifting her face to his and locking eyes.
“We have to feed the beast.”
“What if that only makes it hungrier?” she asked.
“Then we’ll feed it until it’s not hungry anymore. Everything gets full eventually.” His hand grazed up her side, tracing her curves gently. Every inch he touched burned, even through her clothes. “Do you remember what I said last night?”
That if she asked him to kiss her while sober, he’d give her incredible, mind-blowing orgasms? Yeah. She remembered. That wasn’t something a girl was likely to forget—not when it came from a guy like Eric. She nodded breathlessly because his hand had slid toward her butt.
“Ask me, Shel. Two words. One sentence. Ask me.”
She hesitated, because the second she said them, the second she made this real, it would be over. His hands would be on her, and his lips would meld to hers, and she’d be lost.
In him.
“Ask.” He dug his fingers into the soft flesh of her butt. “Me.”