Taking What's His (Shillings Agency 4)

She shoved his shoulders, rage making her see red. “You son of a bitch, you knew, didn’t you? You knew what I’d been offered, so you broke it off.”

“I—” He tugged on his collar. “Why didn’t you take the job?”

“Answer my question first.”

He shook his head, locking gazes with her. “No. You.”

“I’m leaving,” she snapped.

He cursed under his breath, caught her around the waist, and pressed her against a tree, cradling her the whole time to make sure the bark didn’t hurt her. “Damn it, Lyd, yes. Yes, I knew, and yes, I lied. I lied to you so you’d leave, but you didn’t do it. You stayed. Why did you stay?”

“I didn’t not take the job because of you, you pompous ass. I didn’t take it because I didn’t want to. It had nothing—I repeat, nothing—to do with you. And even if we’d stayed together, it still would have had nothing to do with you. I make my choices based on me, and me alone. Not a guy I’m sleeping with. Who do you think you are?”

“Lydia—”

“Don’t. Just don’t. You ruined everything. And you—”

Without giving her a chance to finish talking—and she had so much she wanted to say—his mouth punished hers with a harsh kiss.

It was as if everything he felt, and wanted to say, was in that kiss. And it hurt, emotionally, to feel it all. Because he’d let her think he didn’t care, when he did. Because he’d taken the beautiful thing they’d had, and ruined it. Because…because…

Because he was too late.

Chapter Seventeen

Holt kissed Lydia, every moment of pain he’d felt since telling her he didn’t give a shit about her fading away to nothing. Now that she was in his arms again, the world felt as if it was back on its axis. She hadn’t gone to Delaware, but it hadn’t been because of him. She hadn’t gone because she hadn’t wanted to move away from her family.

So that meant they could be together, thank fucking God.

Because he’d realized, over the past few days, that he missed her. That she meant more to him than he’d ever realized. That he could love her, if given the chance.

He really fucking could.

Her hands curled in his shirt, and she made a small sound that went straight to his heart. When he’d walked away from her, he’d thought he’d been doing the right thing. The last few days had been pure hell without her, and now she was here, and she wasn’t leaving…and he’d do anything to get her back. Any-fucking-thing.

Because he missed her more than he missed feeling normal.

Reluctantly, he broke the kiss off. Resting his forehead on hers, he took a shaky breath. It was time to tell her all of that, and hope to hell that she forgave him. Please forgive me. “Lyd, I’m so fucking sorry.”

Lydia pressed her fingers to her mouth. “Why did you do that? Why didn’t you ask me—?”

“What the fuck, man?” Steven came up behind them, grabbing Holt by the shoulder and shoving him backward. “What the hell are you doing?”

She rushed forward, standing in front of Steven. “Stop it! He—”

“Why did you kiss her?” Steven demanded, ignoring Lydia as if she didn’t even exist. “You think I wouldn’t notice? I mean, she’s the only one here with wavy red fucking hair.”

“Strawberry blonde,” Holt said without really meaning to. “It’s strawberry blonde, not red.”

“Whatever. It doesn’t—” Steven staggered back a step. “Wait a minute. That’s how you described that girl you went out on a date with a week or two ago. Tell me you aren’t fucking around with my little sister behind my back. Tell me.”

Holt flinched, remembering all the things he’d said before he realized that the woman he’d been intrigued by was Steven’s little sister. “I didn’t know who she was, at first. I swear it. By the time I found out, it was too late.”

“Steven…” Lydia said, wringing her hands. “This really isn’t any of your business. I can take care of myself. And I can answer for myself, too.”

Holt held his hands up, but not because he was scared or anything. It was just a measure of respect. But now that he knew Lydia wasn’t leaving, it was time to come clean. “I know you can, but he needs to understand what’s up.”

“What’s the point?” she asked, crossing her arms. “It’s over.”