Say You're Mine (Shillings Agency 5)
Page 46
Out of all the questions, that wasn’t the one he expected her to avoid. What was so damn bad that she had to hide it from him? That she refused to answer? “Seriously? That’s the one you don’t want to answer?”
“Yep.” She didn’t so much as waver from her decision. “What’s my dare?”
“Give me a chance to be more than a friend to you. Let me be your lover. Your friend. The person you come home to at night, the one who holds you when you’re upset. The guy who needs you as much as you need him.” He locked eyes with her. “Let me be yours, and say you’re mine.”
She didn’t say anything. Just stared.
And stared some more.
She was silent for so long that he was tempted to snap a finger in her face to jerk her out of whatever world she currently resided in. But just as he was about to, she opened her mouth. “I want to. I do,” she said, wringing her hands in front of her chest. “I just… It scares me. The idea of losing you.”
“I told you.” He cupped her face and offered her a small smile. “I’m not going anywhere, cupcake. Even if you break my heart, I’ll be right here. At your side.”
She shook her head slightly, pressing her face closer to his palm. Turning, she kissed it. Her touch lingered even when she faced him again. “I believe you. I do. But you’re you, and I’m me…”
“And you don’t think we could make it work,” he said flatly.
She bit down on her lip hard. “Do you?”
“I do.” He ran his hand down her neck and over her back till he rested right above her ass. “I really fucking do. I think we could be happy. If you let me, I think I could spend the rest of my life trying to make you smile and laugh.” His mind wandered to what he’d seen earlier, on her nightstand. She had a glass jewelry box, so when he’d been pacing and thinking, he’d seen it. Sitting there. Plain as day. “Do you remember what we promised each other after I came home from my first tour?”
She gaped at him for so long he gave up on getting an answer from her. Maybe she didn’t remember. Maybe he was the only one that clung to long ago spoken words that meant so much and yet—
“Yeah.” She cleared her throat. “We said we would get married if we were both single when you were thirty.” She scooted away from him, shrugging out of his hold, and hugged her knees, watching him warily. “You remember that?”
“Of course I remember it.”
They locked gazes, neither one moving.
Finally, she gripped her calves tighter and spoke. “Why are you mentioning this now? That was a lifetime ago.”
“I’ve been thinking about it. A lot.”
She gave a nervous laugh. “But why?”
“I think I said those things for a reason. Something I wasn’t sure of, or even wanting to consider, but I think when I asked you to marry me if we were both single, it was because I had a feeling this moment would come. That when we were both ready, you’d be mine, and I’d be yours, and it would just be right.” He cleared his throat. “I saw it in your jewelry box this morning. I didn’t open it or anything, but it was resting right on the top, inside the
glass lid. You kept the ring. Why?”
She covered her face. “Oh God.”
“Lauren.”
“I couldn’t get rid of it,” she whispered. “It was a silly thing, and we were drunk, but to me…it was special. And I didn’t want to forget that moment, so I kept it. It’s not a big deal or anything. Just a keepsake.”
He swallowed. It had been special to him, too. He just hadn’t realized it till now, almost nine years later. “I’m single, and thirty.”
“Don’t.” She hopped up, covering her mouth with a trembling hand. “You can’t be serious right now. We had sex twice. Twice. That doesn’t mean we should get married.”
“Jesus.” He stood, too, and held his arms out. “I’m not asking you to marry me, for fuck’s sake. I’m not that much of an asshole. If I ever asked anyone to marry me, it would be a hell of a lot better than this moment.”
She lowered her hand. “What are you asking me?”
“The same thing I already asked for. Be my girlfriend. For the first time in forever, I found a new purpose. It’s to make you happy. To make you laugh so hard you have to clutch your stomach. To brighten your life up, and to let you do the same to mine. To be your person.”
“You’re already my person,” she said, smiling. Her eyes watered. “My best person.”
“But I want to be more. To be everything.” He grabbed her hands and squeezed. “You and I? We make sense. It’s why I made that silly promise all those years ago. Tell me I’m wrong.”