His Best Mistake (Shillings Agency 6)

Those whispers and cries haunted you.

Chased you into darkness.

Lots of soldiers turned to drink to drown them out.

He’d done it once or twice himself. For him, though, he found the best way to cope with the bad was to focus on the good. Like Ginny’s hugs. And the way she smelled fresh out of the bath, like strawberries and cream. And the way she called him Daddy, and stared up at him with bright blue eyes that she’d gotten from Tina.

Those moments? Those smiles? They saved him.

Too bad Daisy’s father hadn’t been able to do the same.

Maybe her life would be different.

And maybe they would have stood a chance.

“I’m sorry,” he said simply, not sure what else to say. There was nothing else to say. She stared at him blankly, and he cleared his throat. “I should probably go. Ginny’s been having bad dreams lately, and if she wakes up, I want to be there for her.”

A sad smile lit up her face. “You sound like you’re a good dad. I’m sorry for—”

“It’s fine.” He reached out, hesitated halfway, but then followed through and brushed his knuckles across her cheek. “I like you, Daisy. A lot.”

She swallowed. “I like you, too.”

“I want to be your friend. Can we be friends?” He hesitated because he wasn’t really sure what the hell he was saying right now, but he went with it anyway. “I want to be here for you. I want to kiss you and hold you and make you cry out in pleasure, but I want to be here for the other things, too. The bad nights. The good ones. Whatever you need, I want to be there.”

She slid off the bed, grabbed her robe, and draped it over her shoulders. “That sounds an awful lot like being more than friends to me, which is a bad idea.”

“Call it whatever the fuck you want. I want that.”

She bit down on her lip. “Look, I get it. You get off on the chase. It’s a thrill. But—”

“It’s not just that.”

She shot him a doubtful look. “If we’re friends, most nights will end up like this, with you chasing me, me giving in, us having sex, and then you going home. Eventually, someone will want more, and eventually, someone will get hurt. Why go there?”

“Why not?”

A laugh escaped her. “I just told you why.”

“I’m not saying we should be a couple. But let’s just…let’s keep doing what we’re doing. No one has to know, and we can just be friends, or we can fuck, or…whatever you want, I’ll give it to you. And if one of us decides that this whole friendship thing isn’t going to work, or that their feelings are getting too deep to be avoided anymore, then we split.” He held his palms out, open to the ceiling. “That’s it. No questions asked. No commitment. No hurt feelings. Just us, doing this, and being there for one another.”

“And if someone does get their feelings hurt?”

“They won’t.” He caught her hand. “We won’t.”

She bit her lip and pulled free, tucking her hand behind her back. “Sure.”

“We know what we want and what we’re doing, and neither of us wants to be a long term couple. So we won’t be. I want you, Daisy. I’m not afraid to admit I can’t just walk away because I don’t feel like we’re done. Do you?”

She stared at him for so long he thought he overstepped, but then she did the last thing he expected. She shook her head. “I don’t feel done, either. But it has to be a secret. Lauren will flip if she finds out.”

“It’ll be our secret,” he said, crossing the room and grabbing her hand, bringing it to his lips and locking eyes with her. “I swear it.”

“Then fine. We’ll be…friends.” She wiggled her fingers in his. “Until one of us changes our mind, and calls this whole thing off. It’ll probably be me. I’m a runner. And I need to focus on my career right now, not on some guy I’m sleeping with.”

“The guy you’re sleeping with happens to like running after you.”

She rolled her eyes. “I noticed.”