Chicks, Man

I shove my chair out from under me, and it skids halfway across the room. “You can proceed now? Why didn’t you proceed when you first got wind of Miller Industries? Huh?” I stop, my lungs straining, and I cough. “Pointless lives lost because you didn’t do your job! And where is Benjamin Miller now? His son? Have you found his son?”

There’s no hiding the slip in composure, guilt riding in his tone. “I understand you’re upset—”

“I’m more than goddamn upset! I’m fucking furious! I’m a wreck! My girlfriend is lying in a hospital bed fighting for her life and I feel useless to her.” I cover my mouth, another round of barking coughs.

“And I’m sorry it’s come to this. Sometimes cases aren’t followed through as they should be. I won’t make an excuse for why Benjamin Miller has gotten away with what he did, but I will promise to make sure he doesn’t ever again and goes away for a long time.”

My heart pounds. In and out, like an emotional volcano is about to erupt in my chest. “And Connor?”

Goddammit.

“I’m sorry. Still nothing. We have our best men out searching for him. His picture is splattered all over the news and he’s on a no-fly list. He can’t get too far—”

“Hey, Poindexter, why don’t you beat it? Go do your job or something, yeah?” We both turn to see Chase walking in holding two coffees. Shock, yet relief washes over me at a familiar face. Detective Shaw nods and heads to the door. “I’ll keep you posted,” he says before walking out.

“Hey, you didn’t have to come all—”

“And support two of my closest friends? Not a chance. I’m here for you, man.” He pats me on the back, and I wince. “Oh shit, sorry.” He hands me a coffee, and I readjust, sitting as close to Hannah’s bed as possible in hopes she can sense me by her. Chase follows suit, taking up the extra seat on her other side. “How’s she doin’?” he asks. Lost is his sarcastic tone, in its place genuine concern.

“Better, but not as good as the doctors had hoped. They expected her to wake up by now, but you know, trauma can cause people to stay under until they’re mentally healed and able to come back to us,” I say, the same words I continue to repeat and repeat and repeat. She’s healing. She’ll come back to us when she’s ready.

Silence takes over for some time before the beeping sound becomes too much and Chase breaks the quiet. “You okay, man?”

I take some time to digest that question. When I lift my eyes to meet his, my answer is honest. “No. I’m not.”

Fear is like a disease. It shows no mercy and spreads like a wildfire to the mind, body, heart. It creates a dark mass, eradicating any hope to flee from this nightmare. Weariness crashes into me like a tidal wave, and my shoulders slump.

“So, little Hannah Matthews, huh?” The question breaks my thoughts. He’s trying to change the subject. Find an open window to lighten the mood. A crest of a smile breaches my face thinking about all the happiness she’s brought into my life. “Yeah, dick. And she’s not little anymore.”

“Yeah, got that at Kip’s wedding. Are her boobs real, because she sure filled out that—ouch!” he yelps when I toss a cup at him. “I’m kidding. I just wanted to make you smile. Shit, you look like hell. Should you even be out of bed?” I’m fine. I’m right where I need to be. With her. “Dude, when she wakes up, she’s going to be greatly disappointed. Have you showered? Eaten? If I was a chick, I’d definitely be a little pissed to wake up to the sore eyes of you.”

I stare at him, realizing he’s right. I haven’t done any of the above. I’ve convinced everyone else to eat, shower, take some time, but I refuse to take my own advice. Because if she wakes up and I’m not here…

“I mean, I find you quite attractive in those hospital scrubs, but for real, go find a water fountain and bathe in it or some shit. Even better, have your special nurse give you a sponge bath. I’ll sit here with her.”

“And if she wakes up and sees you? I believe she’d rather see my piece of shit self.” We both laugh, and Chase shrugs, agreeing.

“Either way, take care of yourself. Walk down the hallway and back. Move your legs. You’re not helping her by not taking care of yourself. She’s gonna need you when—and I do say when—she wakes up.”

I can’t fight the tears at his words. I’m sure I look like a pussy, but I can’t stop them. “Thanks, brother.”

“None needed. Like you said. Brothers.” I get up, not saying anything else, and he gives me a reassuring nod. I face the door, urging my feet to walk out of the room. I’m two steps out when I almost turn around, but Chase is right. I need to be strong for Hannah when she wakes up.