“Love you too, Aunt Leelyn.”
We hung up the phone as I continued to make my way back into the city. Aunt Leelyn had always been there for me. My mother and father had been magicians. During one of the water acts that consisted of my mother being shackled and tied underwater while my father hung upside down in a straightjacket, my mother had died.
The straightjacket had been put on wrong and the fail-safe was broken. My mom drowned looking up at my dad. They had been each other’s world.
Two months after Mom’s death, Dad killed himself with a bullet to the head. I still remember sitting at the window, watching the firework show at our neighbor’s house on Fourth of July. Amidst all the noise, a loud bang echoed through the house that wasn’t a firework.
Bang.
The memory of the sound still brought an involuntary shudder to my body. A tear slipped down my cheek as the memory momentarily escaped the vault I tried to keep it in.
Running down the hall, I found my dad lying on the floor—lifeless. Blood pooled around him as the firecrackers continued to go off across the street.
Bang.
Bang.
Bang.
To this day, I hated fireworks.
The suicide note said, I miss my love. Leelyn, please take care of Ashlin. I still wondered why my dad hadn’t thought I was enough to stick around for. If only I could find someone who thought I was enough.
Parking in my designated parking spot in the garage of our building, I got out and hit the button on my car remote. The lights flashed as I made my way to the elevator.
The garage elevator attendant, Joe, greeted me, wearing his normal black business suit attire. “Evening, Miss Thomas.”
“Evening, Joe. How was your day?”
He hit the top floor button. “It was very nice, Miss Thomas. Mr. Huntington arrived about twenty minutes ago. How was your evening?”
I gave a slight nod and a tired smile. “It was good.”
I caught a glimpse of myself in the side wall mirror of the elevator. My long golden-blonde hair was done up on my head and my teal eyes looked tired and slightly lost. Even I could see the sadness emanating from my slim-average-height figure. I looked at the floor unable to gaze back at the person I saw a moment ago. Did I look this unhappy all the time? I hoped not. The elevator came to a halt on our floor.
“Night, Joe.”
“Night, Miss Thomas.”
Walking out of the elevator, I entered the foyer that led to the front door. Taking a deep breath, I unlocked the door. Stepping across the threshold, the dread I always felt returned—this wasn’t home still after a year.
We lived on the top floor of a building in Manhattan. The only thing beautiful about this place was the view. Everything else, except my office, was cold and depressing. The walls were done in steel-gray with black furniture that felt like you were sitting on concrete. Supposedly, that was elegant and classy for the type of people we entertained here from time to time, per Harris’ mother. I disagreed. Slipping off my heels, I followed the low classical melody that came from the living room. I stopped at the entrance and leaned against the column, watching Harris looking out into the city.
He was in lounge pants and a T-shirt, which was a rare sight these days. Normally, he stayed in his business slacks and dress shirt until bedtime. As I stood there watching, Harris ran his hands through his messy coal-black hair and sighed heavily. I knew his piercing blue eyes probably looked lost and abandoned by his stance.
Quietly, my feet padded over to where Harris stood and I wrapped my hands around his firm middle. Harris got up at four every morning to work out. His body showed the dedication.
Kissing his shoulder, I spoke, “Hey, there. I missed you tonight. Amelia and Steven are on their way to Barbados. It was beautiful. They wished you could have made it, but understood why you weren’t able to.”
I nuzzled my face into his back and took in his scent. Since Harris had made it big financially, or rather inherited it, he had changed his more subtle smell to something spicier. I preferred the old cologne. His hands came to rest on top of mine and my heart swelled at the tender moment. They were few and far between. This moment right here was why I kept holding on to the thought that Harris would come back to me.
Harris dropped his hands. “I needed you with me tonight. I was the only man there without his significant other. I looked like a fool. This was important to me, Ashlin.”
I dropped my hands and took a step back as my heart lost the warmth it felt and splintered instead. “Amelia and Steven used to be your friends, too. Or have you forgotten everything that happened before a year ago? Did you think that maybe it was important for you to be with me? Or how foolish I looked that my boyfriend of five years, who supposedly adores me, chose a business dinner over me?”
Harris turned and the irritation was evident. His piercing blue eyes were angry. “I don’t want to go over this again. You know I spend all day working so you can have the best of everything. This is always about you. Do you not appreciate what I sacrifice to give you all of this?” Harris’ hand swept across the room.
“I wish we didn’t have all of this. I wish we could go back to before the money. We were happy and got by fine. When was the last time we laughed? Hell, when was the last time we made love? When was the last time you said you loved me?” Harris stood there staring at me. I couldn’t take it anymore. “I’m going to work in my office. Don’t wait up for me. Not that you would.”