Tempting Perfection

The anger inside me simmered to a near boiling point when I saw a picture of Matilda. “I want to talk to them.”

Kurt interjected. “Sawyer.”

“No, I’m serious. Why in the world would they pretend their daughter committed suicide and blame me? That is so fucked up. I don’t understand. I have carried around the guilt of Adriane’s death. It was all a sham. Every part of it. I deserve answers. You don’t get it! I used to come home from college for the weekend, and no one would say a word to me. They wouldn’t even cook enough food. I was invisible to them for years!” I took a calming breath. “I always tried to see the best in them. They’re my parents. But I don’t want them to be a part of my life in any way. None.”

Kurt raised his hand. “Okay. We’ll call them. But don’t you want to talk to Cameron first?”

Cameron. What would he think? In all my anger, I’d forgotten about him. He deserved to be part of this. “No, you’re right. I need to calm down. And Cameron should know before I do anything.”

This was a nightmare I was unable to wake up from. Mob. The word bounced around my head like a pinball machine. “Why wasn’t I told about their mob dealings when they were uncovered?”

Joe met my eyes. “I’ve been instructed to let Mr. Shaw answer that question. He and Mrs. Shaw will be returning from his parents’ shortly to talk with you.”

Joe left the room, and I stared at the files. I turned to Kurt. “Did you know?”

“Not to this extent. I knew they had a meeting with Navarro. But it was about a loan. I figured it wasn’t important. You knew about their financial problems.”

At least he’d told me. “Did you know before or after LA?”

“Before. After LA, we weren’t in a good place, and things with your parents seemed fine. Normal. I honestly didn’t think about it until Joe just brought it up.”

I leaned back into Kurt’s arms. “This is a clusterfuck.”

“Yeah, it is. I wish you didn’t have to deal with this.”

“Me, too.”

A f

ew minutes later, there was a knock. Garrick walked through the door as if he’d just left a business meeting; Knoah was by his side. She looked worried as she chewed on her lip.

I cocked my eyebrow. “Shaw, I want answers.”

Garrick sat on the edge of the couch across from us and met my eyes. “I will answer what I can. Navarro was a nasty man, and there are some things I cannot discuss.”

“Why’d you keep it from me?” That was the worst part—feeling like an outsider to all this. Everyone knew except me. And my best friend knew, which felt a little like betrayal.

“I thought your dad was a businessman in trouble. I’ve seen it multiple times. Desperate people gray the lines between right and wrong. I thought Navarro saw his weakness and targeted him to try to get to me. When it appeared to be just one of Navarro’s games, I let it go. Why ruin a family unnecessarily for a bad decision? Your father never acted suspiciously.”

“This is such a mess.” I put my hand on my forehead.

Garrick responded, “Yes, it is.”

Knoah hadn’t said much, but she fidgeted with her fingers. I knew she had known. But oddly, I understood their reasoning. I didn’t like it, but I got it. If Kurt needed me to keep something private, I would. I had. Inside I felt a little at odds with my emotions. In spite of the feelings of betrayal, if they had told me, I would have been devastated at the time and might not have believed them. It had been a no-win situation for everyone involved.

I stood and opened my arms to Knoah. “Don’t worry, I get it. I’m a little hurt, but I get it.” Sighing, I continued, “This is on my parents. Not you guys. You guys weren’t the ones who did it.”

Knoah threw her arms around me. “I would never want to hurt you. Know that. I thought they were good parents. I still can’t wrap my head around the fact that you have a sister or that they faked her death.”

“Me, either. Appearances can be deceiving. You and I know this.”

Knoah teared up, which caused my eyes to sting. “I’m so sorry.”

“It’s not your fault.”

Suddenly, I was exhausted. Kurt came to my side. “I think we’re going to rest for a bit. We’ll catch up later.”

Touching my stomach, Knoah said, “Take care of yourself. Don’t let them complicate the pregnancy. You, Kurt, and Dylan are what you focus on.”