I must have stared at his body for minutes, but it felt like hours, as Raig spoke quietly to his man.
“Okay, Cillian, let the Council know it’s done.”
The screeching of the hinges of the door alerted me to the fact there was movement, but it wasn’t until a big hand landed on my shoulder that I snapped out of it.
“Did you really give him Polonium, amico?” Ben asked as we all looked at Ribeiro.
“Nah, we only save the good shite for people who earn it. This guy was a small-dicked weasel, we wouldn’t waste it on him.”
Nick cleared his throat next to me, and I turned my head slowly to see him frowning down at the body. “Your woman and son are okay. Sacha and the families are with them.”
Then, he added, “Shame he wouldn’t have to go through the pain of Polonium. I’ll have to remember that for next time.”
“It’s a helluva thing to use and clean up,” Raig said as he walked to the door. “You’ve got your hands, the plane, the vehicle, the traces everywhere you go. Then you’ve got to administer the shite the chemist comes up with so you don’t get sick.
“I’m not saying it’s not worth doing, but it’s like putting a bag of glitter in front of a fan. Not a good craic, get me?”
The door shut behind him, leaving me with Ben, staring at where Raig had just been.
“He’s a crazy coglione, fratello.”
Yeah, he was a crazy fucker. “Just as well he’s on our side, drug.”
Then, looking around the cabin with a look of disgust on his face, Ben asked, “What do you want done with this?”
“Blow it up. Send a message.”
Tilting one side of his mouth up in a smile, Benito nodded at the order. “Wise choice, man. We don’t know who managed to get away yet, but that will definitely make a point.”
We’d only just stepped out of the shack, when he added, “Owing a lot of markers to some very weird people, man.”
Regardless of what I’d thought and how set I’d been about not doing that previously, I didn’t care anymore. “They’re worth it.”
Epilogue
Nell
It’d been a month since it’d all happened, and the boys were absolutely fine, and now exceeding milestones.
The same couldn’t be said about me.
I had nightmares, panic attacks, flashbacks—all of them reliving Donna tipping backward, with Hendrix held in front of her.
When I slept, I woke up screaming, thinking about not getting to Hendrix fast enough as she tipped over the edge, or I’d do it thinking the boys were both missing and get up to find them.
The worst nightmare had been one where the snaps on Hendrix’s onesie had popped open, and he’d fallen through my arms down to the floor below.
Taras had moved them into the room next door to ours so I didn’t wake them up, but it also meant I didn’t have to go far in the middle of the night to check on them.
Last week, they’d started to die down slightly, meaning I got more sleep before one hit, but it was still a problem.
In fact, I’d woken up to one tonight just as they’d started crying to be fed, so Taras was just putting them back down while I lay staring at the ceiling, waiting for him to come back to bed.
I was exhausted and stressed, but I was also happy. It was a weird mix of emotions that I couldn’t separate, but I had my three boys, my best friend was okay, my family were all alive, and I had the Bratva helping keep my sons safe now, too.
I needed to accept that they were safe now, I knew that, but it was hard to switch off to what’d happened.
Closing my eyes, I went through the mental exercises that Bogdan, of all people, had given me a few days ago. Apparently, they were what they taught the soldiers for when things like this hit them, and they were highly effective. Pop-pop, newly released from his lockdown, had agreed, and told me to trust in the advice.
The mind had the power to change the body, so I needed to use it to fight the war inside it.
I started by picturing the walls around us, like they were an impenetrable fortress. The boys were safe inside it, and each of the soldiers and men around them were the titanium bars that protected them.
The more bars I added, the more relaxed I became.
Until a hand wrapped itself around my ankle.
Taras was back.
“Well, moye serdste, our sons are asleep now, so you only have me to worry about,” he murmured as he climbed onto the bed, pausing between my legs. “It seems I can put everyone else’s minds at ease, but not yours. What should I do about that?”
Lifting my head to look at him in the light coming through the windows, I grinned at him. “It’ll happen, it’s just taking its time.”