“Based on the size of the fetus, I’m estimating your due date to be March twenty-first,” she says. “It might change give or take a couple days.” She clicks on her iPad, then turns to me. “That puts you at roughly seven weeks.”
Jeez, has it been that long since I got a period? I’m almost two months along. I do the math in my head. That would’ve been around… And like a bucket of ice water has been poured over me, I sit up quickly, trying to take in oxygen. My heart is going erratic and I can’t catch my breath. It feels as though all the blood has drained from my body. My trembling hands clutch my chest as I try to slow my heartrate.
“Lexi, are you okay?” Dr. O’Neil asks, concerned.
“Can you tell…based on your calculations…when the baby was conceived?”
The doctor’s brows dip in confusion, but she doesn’t question my question. Instead she clicks on her iPad, then says, “We can’t pinpoint the exact date, since days of ovulation for everyone differs, but based on your due date, it would be around July first.”
July first.
The day I was attacked.
That date remains engrained in my brain. And I’m pretty sure it always will.
One hand roughly grips my mane, tugging my head back.
My knees slam against the rocks.
“Stop!” I plead.
The other hand slides under my bikini bottoms.
“Please don’t do this,” I beg.
“You’re a fucking tease! And teases like you deserve what they get.”
“Ow! That’s hurts. Please don’t do this.”
“Lexi…Lexi, baby. Come back to me.” Alec. His soft voice.
I open my eyes, and I’m back on the porch swing with Alec.
“I think he raped me,” I whisper, my eyes refusing to meet his. It’s the first time I’ve said the words aloud, and they feel like sandpaper as they leave my lips. “All the flashbacks in my head…” I choke out a sob. “They lead to him raping me. And the doctor…she said my estimated date of conception was July first.”
When Alec doesn’t say anything, I glance up at him. His jaw is hard and his eyes are closed. I can’t imagine what’s going through his head. This baby…it’s supposed to be our baby. But there’s a chance it’s not. And it’s not fair to put him through this.
“That’s why I can’t marry you,” I explain. “I can’t ask you to commit to spending your life with me when there’s a chance I’m carrying another man’s baby.”
Alec opens his eyes and looks at me, and the pain radiating in them is enough to cripple my heart. “I should feel disgusted that I’m possibly carrying a baby by a man who raped me, but I can’t find it in me to be. Because even though it’s possibly half his, this baby is also half mine, and when I saw him on the monitor—”
“Him?”
“I don’t know. It just felt wrong calling him or her an it. He had a heartbeat…”
Alec nods. “Why didn’t you tell me about your appointment?”
“I wasn’t completely sure if I was pregnant. When you mentioned the guys at work had the flu, I wondered if maybe I had it too. I wanted to confirm it and then tell you so we could celebrate. But then the doctor gave me the dates and I realized celebrating wouldn’t be happening.”
Alec turns his body toward me and takes my hands in his. His gaze locks with mine, and I feel sick to my stomach. He warned me to be careful. Not to stay on the beach too late. I didn’t listen…
“I need you to listen to me very carefully,” he says. “I love you with every part of my being. I knew years ago you were the one for me, but I was a coward, too scared to lose you to tell you how I felt. But then my dad died, and it gave me the courage to not waste a single moment. I realized from his death how precious life is. How short it is. You can do everything right and it can still end before you’re ready for it to.”
His words cause my throat to fill with emotion.
“You’re mine, Lexi Scott,” he continues. “You’ve been mine our entire lives in some way or another, and if you think this news is going to change that you don’t understand how strong my love for you is.”
“But—”
“No,” he says. “No buts. This baby you’re carrying is ours. End of story. We’re going to go home and get ready and then go to Georgia’s graduation. And then when it’s over we’ll go to your parents’ house for the graduation party. Tonight, I’ll hold you in my arms and we’ll talk about our future…”
A fresh round of tears form and spill over. My body racking with sobs.
“Next week we’ll get married in front of our friends and family, and when we’re ready we’ll announce that we’re expecting a baby. And in seven months we’ll welcome that baby into the world. We’ll love him and protect him and he will be ours.” His eyes and tone carry such conviction, goose bumps cover my arms.