“Oh.”
“Yeah, oh.” I stood up and rolled my sleeves back down. “We’re going to have to walk to the nearest house, or at least until we have reception.”
Joe, Kelly/Magenta, and Dickson were still lined up, only now they were doing high kicks and throwing their boas around. “Guys, hey, guys!” I called. “Guys!” I shouted louder. “Would you stop doing those stupid dances and come join the conversation? We have a problem here.”
“But we have to practice,” Dickson whined. “How do you expect us to win the talent show? There’s going to be a lot of stiff competition.”
“There isn’t going to be any talent show or any Ricky Hopper Show convention if we don’t find someone with a phone, or a car. We are stuck out here. S-T-U-C-K. Do you understand?”
“It’s Rocky Horror,” Dickson said, sulking.
I pulled out my stake. Just a little bit, but enough for him to get the message.
“So,” he said, quickly coming over to join the powwow David and I had going on. “Which way should we go for help?”
I scanned the woods. There was a light in the distance. “Over there.” I pointed. “There’s a light.”
“Over at the Frankenstein place?” Joe said.
“Huh?” I looked at him.
“Burning in the fireplace?” Kelly replied.
“There’s a liiiight,” they all sang.
I put up one finger and they all stopped. “New rule: no more singing. Agreed?”
Silence greeted me, but there were nods all around.
“Okay. We go that way.”
I led the way to the house and we traipsed through the dark woods. Of course, of course, the house was a giant monstrosity of a thing that looked like something from a horror movie. The grass in the front yard was up to our knees, with rusted vehicles littering the lawn. Vehicles that had busted-out windshields and cracked driver’s side windows.
“Nothing says ‘Hey, I’m normal’ like a car graveyard in front of your house,” I muttered. I pulled out my phone. Still no service.
“Should we knock?” Dickson asked. “It’s kind of . . . creepy.”
“Let’s go to the next house,” Kelly urged. “I don’t think they’re doing the Time Warp in there.”
“Seriously? A vampire is freaked out by a house?” I gave a disgusted shake of my head and pushed on the doorbell.
The door swung open.
No one was there, but instantly all of the vampires took a step back. Joe actually nudged me forward a bit.
“Go on,” he said. “Ask if they’ve got a phone. And while you’re at it, go see what’s on the slab.”
They all snickered, and I glared at them. “Why me? You’re the fiends from hell.”
“I resent that,” Joe replied. He pointed back at himself with both hands. “Dental assistant.”
“Fine,” I muttered. But I took a step forward. “Stay here.” The last thing I needed was for some overly zealous fanatic with a strict belief system to take offense at a vampire in a feather boa. “I’ll be right back.”
The door slammed shut behind me as soon as I was across the threshold, but at this point? I was expecting that. Spooky slamming doors went hand in hand with spooky houses. Besides, I’ve trained for years to learn not to jump at loud noises.
“Hello?” I called, adopting the tone of a lost and scared teenage girl. “Is anyone home?” It was always to my advantage to let people think I’m something I’m not. “I need to use your phone. My car broke down and I—”
It was a soft noise that stopped me. A noise coming from the heat vent in the floor.