"I think I need to."
"Good." He adjusted the rearview mirror. "I've known for just over a week. He's been giving you extra responsibilities since before the kids were born, but I only recently started thinking it might mean something. I asked him a couple of times, but he brushed me off. I was getting pissed, because I knew the one person who hadn't figured it out was you, and that's not right. I didn't like keeping my suspicions from you--it felt like a secret. So I called him on it. He admitted that he's planned to make you Alpha for years. The kids just slowed things down."
He whizzed past a truck. "Is that what's been bothering you? You thought I've known for a while and hadn't said anything?"
"Jeremy would have made you keep it a secret until he was ready. I'd understand that."
"You'd understand if I kept something that big from you? You shouldn't. Because I wouldn't. That's why Jeremy wouldn't confirm it. If there's a conflict between loyalty to mate and Alpha, Jeremy knows better than to test me on it."
And if that mate was also his Alpha? I turned to stare out at the dark waters of the inlet.
"You didn't suspect?" Clay asked after a moment.
"I noticed Jeremy's been asking my opinion more often, encouraging me to make decisions in the field, but that's been gradually happening for years. I thought that was just because I was getting more experienced and he felt more comfortable handing things off, knowing I wouldn't run off to Toronto again. Once he started seeing Jaime, it made sense that he wanted someone who could take over when he goes away for the weekend. But take over for good?" I took a deep breath. "No, I didn't see that coming."
I watched the rising moon skate across the waves and, for a second, thought I saw the white back of a beluga. I kept staring, telling myself I was just waiting for it to resurface.
"So how--" Clay began.
"Is Jeremy crazy?" I cut in, twisting to face him, seat belt digging into my neck. "I know, I shouldn't question his decisions. The Alpha's word is law and I should instinctively obey."
He laughed. "And since when have you done that? Plus in this case, I can safely say you're wrong. Sure, I had my doubts about Jeremy's sanity when he hooked up with Jaime, but I'm over that."
"You know what I mean. The ascension of a new Alpha is supposed to prove to mutts that we're as strong as ever, and bolstering the leadership with fresh blood. What's a female Alpha going to tell them? That we've lost our collective minds."
"Which is why they won't be
lieve it." He swooped past another vehicle daring to obey the speed limit. "They'll think it's a clever way to make me Alpha. If we announced that the crazy guy was in charge, they'd be arming themselves for Armageddon. By saying you're Alpha, it signals that we don't want to panic them. They'll be edgy for a while, but when they see it's business as usual, they'll relax."
"And then you'll take over?"
"Hell, no. You're Alpha."
"And you're okay with that?"
He turned off the highway. "No, I'm pissed. Fuming mad. Can't you tell?"
I gave him a look.
"Deep down, I'm furious. I'm just a master at controlling my emotions."
"Ha-ha."
"If I was fuming, you'd know it. If I was mildly annoyed, you'd know it. I'm not, because I'm not Alpha material. Mutt steps over the line? You and Jeremy say beat the crap out of him, and teach him a lesson. I say kill the bastard and save ourselves any future problems. Not Alpha material."
"But you're the best fighter. Everyone expects it will be you. Do you want to be Alpha?"
"No." He looked over, meeting my gaze and holding it. "I didn't expect to, and I wouldn't accept the post if he offered it. I like being second-in-command. If having you as Alpha means I get to keep doing that, then I'm happy. All that political shit?" He snorted. "Can't be bothered."
"We could be co-Alphas. An Alpha pair, male and female, like wolves."
"What works for wolves doesn't always work for werewolves. To your average mutt, I'd be making you my co-Alpha for the sake of marital harmony, not martial strategy, which wouldn't reflect well on either of us. Werewolves have an Alpha. One wolf to rule them all. And that wolf will be you."
I stared out at a boglike area with skeletal trees, a wasteland surrounded by lush forest.
"But you'd be happier about the promotion if you had more competition."
I turned to him. "What?"