Fill Me (Rouse Me 3)

I mount the horse and take the reins. I'm not exactly an expert, but I've gone horseback riding enough times to know what I'm doing.

Alyssa is clutching the reins with a slightly sick but mostly excited look on her face. When she catches me watching her, she smiles as if to say I'm okay.

"The scenery on this trail is beautiful," Steve says.

He climbs onto his horse and leads us down a beaten dirt trail. The horses move without any prompting--they shuttle tourists down this road day in, day out. They've got it under control.

The scenery is gorgeous. The crystal blue ocean is to our right. A lush tropical forest is to our left. Palm trees and tall grasses sway gently in the breeze.

But they don't hold a candle to Alyssa. She digs her fingers into the leather reins, squeezing her thighs against the saddle tightly. But there's a smile on her face and it's gorgeous, bright. Hell, it's the widest smile I've seen on her in ages.

"You're doing great," I say.

She shakes her head. "I bet you played polo when you were a kid."

"My family isn't that rich."

"You don't deny it." She turns her gaze towards me. Her expression is so bright, so happy. It's like she's finally shrugged some of the tension off her shoulders, finally relaxed.

"I have never played polo. Only Marco Polo."

She laughs, shaking her head in one of her trademark fits of mock outrage. "Such lies."

"I recall playing with you," I say.

"You may have to remind me. I have so many vivid memories of you in that pool." She frowns, but shakes the look off her face. "Mostly good."

We round a corner and come into a clearing. It's gorgeous--a field of bright wildflowers as far as the eye can see. Alyssa's jaw drops. God damn. It's good to see her this taken with something.

It's good to see her this happy.

***

The afternoon passes peacefully. We wander around the beach, dipping our toes in the ocean until the sun sets. The sky is a rainbow of colors--the bright yellow sun sinking into the ocean, bleeding into a soft orange, a bright pink, a cool purple.

Alyssa is here. She's next to me. But I can't tell if I have her attention, if she's lost in the sky or if she's lost in her head.

I squeeze her hand as the sun dips all the way below the water. The color bleeds from the sky, first the red, then the orange. Then it's all purple and blue and black.

I look back to Alyssa. Her eyes are on the sky, on the silver light of the moon. It casts a soft glow on her face, bringing a brightness to her gorgeous blue eyes.

She takes a deep breath and turns her attention to me. "This place is perfect."

I'm tempted to add something, to bring up the distance that's been growing between us for the last three months, but I stay silent. She needs me. She can't bring herself to admit it. Maybe she doesn't even realize it. But she needs me here, near her. For now, at the very least.

"What's wrong?" she asks.

"Nothing," I say.

I lean towards her and brush my lips against hers. We have four more days in paradise. What

ever happens, I'm making the most of these four days.

She slides her hand around my neck. It's soft, sweet, perfect. That's my Alyssa. For now, at least.

Then the kiss breaks, and I push aside the empty feeling in my gut.

The sky is streaked with stars. They're bight, brilliant, perfect.