I pace faster.
"That a no?" he asks.
"Just ask."
"You and Ethan—is that really no strings attached?" His voice drops low enough to convince me he's concerned.
I wish I had an answer. I fold my arms and hold Mal's steady stare. "I'm trying to work on living in the moment."
He chuckles. "That's bullshit."
"Maybe, but it's true. I haven't had any fun since Asher died."
"Any?"
"Not the kind you have with Sharon. Or when you step on stage every night. I know that's hard work, but I see the four of you after. Even you look exhilarated."
"Hmm…" He gives me a paternal once-over.
I'm sure Mal means well, but he's not going to convince me his loyalties lie anywhere other than with Ethan. "It's really none of your business."
"I know."
"Then how about we stay on task?"
"I have an idea about where the money is. If Ethan asks, tell him that."
"That you won't tell me?"
"Yeah."
"Okay." I try to hold a confident posture, but Mal's stare is intense. Within moments, I'm back to pacing.
"Maybe it's none of my business, but do me a favor, Violet. Don't break his heart again."
Anger flares in my chest. Who the fuck does Mal think he is, looking at me with that concerned big brother expression, like I maliciously tore out Ethan's heart and threw it to the wolves?
Doesn't anybody care that he broke my heart?
Doesn't anybody care that Ethan destroyed me?
Obviously not. Mal thinks I destroyed Ethan. Kit thinks I destroyed Ethan. Joel thinks I destroyed Ethan. Piper is on my side, but she's not here to defend me.
Ethan used to be the person who understood me, but this…
Fuck this.
I tap my toe against the carpet. Mal is waiting for a response.
I open my mouth to tell him to go fuck himself. But those words don't fall.
I pace faster.
He stares.
Fine. I need to say something. I offer Mal my best smile. "We're just having fun."
He shakes his head no, you're not.