Closer.
Almost…
My teeth sink into my lip. My stomach tenses. I haven't told him this. Aside from my college therapist, I haven't told anyone this.
Ever.
He murmurs something incomprehensible against my neck.
"You falling asleep?" I whisper.
"I could. But no." He strokes me with that same gentle touch. "You're getting tense again."
I can tell him now.
But what if that changes his opinion of me?
What if I transform from the woman I might want to spend my life with to the damaged freak I need out of my bed, ASAP?
I try to make my voice light. "Is that a surprise?"
He murmurs a no. "It does mean I'll have to make you come again."
I close my eyes and try to push my thoughts away. He's touched me plenty. Even my wrists. He hasn't noticed yet.
Maybe he won't.
Maybe this can stay a secret forever.
"Hey." He runs his fingers through my hair. Over my ear. "You're going off some place."
I nod.
"Take me with you."
"I… I don't know if I can."
"Yeah?"
"Yeah." I take a deep breath and exhale slowly. Still, my chest is tense. My stomach is twisting. "I don't want you to think differently of me."
"You kill someone?"
"Nothing like that."
"You secretly love Justin Beiber?"
My laugh breaks up the tension in my chest. "No."
"I'd forgive you for bad taste."
"I appreciate that."
He nods. Again, he runs his fingers through my hair. The joking tone drops from his voice. "This is a big deal?"
I nod. "I wasn't exaggerating to get in your pants earlier. I think you do know me better than anyone." I press my lips together. "But the way you look at me… it's like you really think I'm this good girl who could never do bad. You really think I am an angel."
His touch is soft. Sweet.